A totally dramatic reunion
by Nina-D-lux
Summary: Years have passed and our favourite campers are out chasing success to keep their fifteen minutes of fame alive. Most of them have lost contact with each other, until Heather decides to throw the social event of the season, a Halloween party, and all her old cast mates are invited. Old flames, new possibilities and some rather questionable costumes. It's going to be scary alright.
1. Where's my address book?

**A/N: Since the end of one of my other fics is nearing, I've decided to go ahead and start posting this TDI story I've been writing for awhile. I've held off on it just to get a head start, so I've already gotten the first few chapters of this story done, so I hope people like it.**

**This story only contains the first main cast, plus Alejandro and Sierra. I suppose I'm also changing canon a little bit to make it...less ridiculous? Not major changes, but lets just pretend Alejandro was never a robot for a year or the island was never a radioactive mutant wasteland.**

"_This MTV red carpet look offends me. She looks like she's hand sewn a throw pillow into a questionable looking A-line skirt, and I know crop tops are all the rage right now, but if I see one more peek-a-boo navel on a red carpet, I will scream. Done to death. This look is boring me. Plus those shoes with the ankle strap so thick it looks like a house arrest anklet? A style Lindsay Lohan could pull off, maybe, but everyone else can put them down and step away slowly with their hands in the air_

Heathers fingers stopped tapping at her keyboard as she sat back and re-read her last paragraph. There. Done. Another article slamming the fashion moves of the elite and famous was complete and ready to send off to her editor.

Working as a columnist for one of the leading women's magazines, 'Scandalous' was a career Heather never thought would be so rewarding. All she did was get paid to write bitchy insults and jokes about famous peoples personal taste.

It was like the job was made for her.

"Knock knock" a pair of people said as they pushed their way into her office, without actually knocking.

Ok, well it wasn't actually _her_ office, she shared with about five other people, but still. She was more important.

The people who just walked in were some of these lesser important people. Brandi Belluci . An assistant editor who's main goal in life was to publish the most blatantly false gossip articles and accuse at least one actress of being pregnant a week, and Dennis Cooper, her partner in crime who made Perez Hilton look kind in his articles. He was the meanest queen to ever coif his hair and deny wearing covergirl concealer.

Collectively they were sued four times in the last year and they wore that like a badge of pride. Forget two faced, this pair had about five faces each, and Heather couldn't stand them. Not so much because of their shady backhanded journalism and questionable morals, but more because she once overheard them calling her Miu Miu shoes tacky in the breakroom one time.

She vowed to hate them forever.

"Brandi! Hiiiii, how are you girl?! Oh my god, Dennis, your shoes are to die. I love"

Of course, they didn't know that.

They all exchanged air kisses and hugs.

"We're good, we're good. Just came back from a sushi lunch at that new place on the avenue, you _have _to go there. You have to come with us some time!" Brandi said with the second fakest smile you can imagine.

"Oh my gosh, I would _love_ too! Next tuesday, sushi lunch date, all three of us. Its happening" Heather said with _the_ fakest smile you can imagine.

She'd rather stab a chopstick in her eye, to be honest.

"So, hows the MTV article going? Found enough ways to creatively insult teen pop stars yet?" Brandi said as she perched herself on Heathers desk.

"Please, they practically write the insults themselves. Whats the big cover scandal you're working on now?"

"Oh, it's a pretty slow news week, but I'm about eighty nine percent certain that Kris Jenner's had a botched boob job, and one of those Direction singers might be gay, so that's what's going to print" Brandi shrugged.

"We just can't decide if we should make the blonde, or the one no one knows, the gay one" Dennis added "That's what our next meeting in half an hours about"

"Why don't you make the popular one gay? You know, Harry?" Heather said.

"Nah, he's slept with too many women, nobody would believe it" Dennis waved her off just as Brandi slammed her hand down on the table, struck by a genius idea.

"We could say he's sleeping with Kris Jenner!"

Dennis gasped "Brilliant! He moved on from her daughter with the milf herself" he gasped again "I can already see the title! Kardashian Kougar pounces in an unexpected direction!"

"Oh em gee, we're amazing"

"I know, I love us"

Heather stared at the two as they exchanged a fistbump.

"So...anyway, what are you guys...you know. Doing here?"

"Oh, god, yeah. Sorry, I got distracted by our genius" said Brandi "We wanted to ask you something"

"A favour, kind of"

Heather frowned a little "What? Why? What's happened?"

These people were not the kind of people who just wanted 'favours'. She'd heard from one of the interns that Brandi had onced asked her to sneak in to a Prada boutique changeroom, just to try and get a photo of Drew Barrymore's cellulite.

She needed to proceed with caution.

"No, no, no, don't stress, it's nothing major. Gosh, you always assume the worst" Brandi said before sighing "It's just that Halloween's coming up and you know how it is, all the same old tired people are throwing the same old tired parties and we're sick of it . We need something fun to go too this year"

Dennis nodded "Yeah, we can't go to Rochelle's haunted house party again, because last year Brandi got molested in the graveyard prop set or whatever, and threw her drink on the guy, but turns out it was Spencer Pratt and we were escorted out by security"

"It's true. Heidi Montag totally shaded me on twitter as well, but took it down the next day. No lie"

Heather knew what this was about without asking, as soon as they mentioned halloween party, and it made a knot in her stomach tighten.

"And we were just wonderiiing" Dennis said in a sing-song voice, and Heather had to hold back a grimace "-since we all heard about that _amazeballs_ party you threw last new years, and then the stories from your birthday party we're even more wild-"

_Please god no. Don't ask. Don't do this to me._

"We totally want to come to your Halloween party!"

"Pleeeease" Brandi clasped her hands together "I know it's _so_ lame to beg, and don't tell anyone we did but we're desperate"

"We are. We want to go to a real celeb halloween party. We know you know Alejandro, I'm like obsessed with the latest episodes of days of our lives, just to watch him because he's so gorgeous. Plus I _need _to meet Lindsay. I want to see her in person so I can tell if her boobs are real or not"

Heather tried to smile apologetically.

There was no way she wanted them at one of her parties. How the hell did she get out having them coming within ten feet of her personal property?

"Oh, guys..sorry, but I'm not actually throwing a halloween party this year-"

"We saw you using work equipment to print out the invites last week" Brandi said.

The knot in her stomach tightened.

"Um...well, I..."

You see, when Heather first landed her job here at Scandalous , she felt...a little out of her league. Which was not a familiar feeling for her. All of these people were glamourous, and had designer bags, with hair as shiny as a Kardashians. They all had money and were ruthlessly mean...just like Heather. She fit in perfectly, but she wasn't a big fish in a little pond anymore, the things that had made Heather a queen bee all her life were suddenly just average traits in this world. She needed something else to rise above them all.

She needed star power.

To be honest she would have rather left her total drama days behind her. After all, who wants their ruthless co-workers getting their hands on old episodes of her being puked on, losing her bikini top, being shaved bald and just generally being humiliated for three seasons worth of entertainment...but it was to bound to be found out eventually that _yes_ she was _that _Heather from _that _show, and _no _her hair was not currently a wig.

Heather just decided to make the best of it. Since a few of her co-stars had gone on to make decent celebrity careers for them selves...she would just name drop going to lunch with Lindsay for example, who was now featured as the 'prize' girl on a new total drama spin off game show. Or that she was visiting her friend LeShawna, a TV show host for a new top forty music hits show. It started as little things like that, even if she hadn't actually talked to any of these people since Total Drama ended.

Then it had to just kind of snow balled. ...she might have escalated the celeb stories to saying Kimye had asked her to their wedding next year and that she had Ryan Seacrest on snap chat.

Just tiny little white lies really.

The only true part to these stories were her parties. Heather did throw very good parties. It's just that the most remotely famous person to ever show up had been Justin Timberlake's personal shopper one time.

Of course, it would be rather hard to keep up this charade of social status if her co-workers showed up to her party and there were in fact no actual celebrities.

"Look, I know what you're worried about" Brandi said, misreading Heather's slightly panicked face "We promise we won't be all weird around your celebrity guests, and we won't be in gossip reporter mode either, no columns about anything that goes on that night, swear to god"

Heather didn't believe that for a second, but that was the least of her worries anyway.

"Yeah, yeah, it's just that..um"

_Theres too many people coming already? It's too late to send a changed guest list to the caterer? …..I'm holding the party in barcelona this year and it's too late for you to catch a flight? I think I'm coming down with malaria?_

No excuse Heather could think of this second was good enough. They were looking at her expectantly. These were co-workers she spent half her time sucking up too just to get ahead at this job. More important, if she didn't suck up to them, they could make her life hell...and not just by insulting every pair of designer shoes she owned. Heather was sure they would reign down a far harsher brand of humiliation if her lying was exposed.

"...I'll see you next friday at eight then! Better have a fab costume!"

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"Oh god, what the hell am I going to do. This is a nightmare. I'm moving back to Korea to live with my grandmother and work the rice paddy for the rest of my life in shame" Heather cried as she flung herself down onto her double bed, phone clutched to her ear.

"_What I just don't get is how investigative reporters didn't pick up on the fact you were lying the whole time. Did you really tell them you went on a date with Robert Pattison? Wouldn't they ask for a photo, or a text, or?"_

"I told them we were on the down low because he was still with K. Stew back then, and I sent myself fake texts"

"_...and they really believe you're invited to Kimye's wedding?"_

"Alejandro, they're not _real_ reporters, they just make crap up after they've had their eleven am glass of Mosacato in order to get a pay check. They swallow this stuff so easily, plus you know first hand how much of an amazing liar I am.

"_True" _Alejandro laughed through the phone.

Ok, so Heather had in fact kept in contact with one of her cast mates. Sporadically. Mostly Alejandro was busy in New York shooting episodes of days of our lives, where he played a wealthy son of an oil tycoon who was sleeping with his stepmother, his rivals girlfriend and his adopted cousin, while recovering from amnesia after he was put in a coma from being shot by his twin brother for the right to the family fortune.

It was an awful show and Heather had denied to this day ever watching it...and getting addicted to it...and Tivoing every episode. The last person on earth who could know this was Alejandro himself.

I mean...right now she would class them as friends. Good friends. Who had once been enemies. Who had hooked up a few times. Then gone on to have a somewhat serious relationship. Then break up again. Then hate each other. Then have revenge hook ups. Then trying a friends with benefits thing. Then dating again. Then another more amicable break up than before...and then there was that time they met in a hotel room five months ago when she visited New York. But now they were just friends again...maybe.

In a nutshell, their facebook relationship status had been set to 'It's complicated' more often than it had ever said 'In a relationship'.

Still, he was the first person she ever thought to call when their was a crisis. Or have a whinge too. This was kind of both.

"But what can I say? Oh, sorry, all of my famous friends just came down with the same cold at the same time? I think everyone must have taken a wrong left turn and got lost on their way here?"

"_Yeah, more lies, I'm sure that'll help"_

"You think this is funny, don't you? You're enjoying yourself right now"

"_Little bit"_

Heather let out a groan and slammed her face into a pillow "This isn't funny, this is tragic. I'll be a laughing stock"

"_You did kind of dig your own grave here with this one"_

"Well, no shit, so now how do I climb my way back out? A few ideas would be nice, if you have them"

"_Umm...I guess you could just call around. Try actually inviting some of the people you claim will be there"_

"And do you have Kim Kardashian and Kanye Wests phone number on you?"

"_I don't mean them, obviously, I mean everyone from Total Drama. Lindsay, LeShawna, Duncan, everyone else. Ask them to come along, they might actually want too. There not exactly on level with Kimye in terms of fame but it's something"_

Heather suddenly un-mushed her face from the duvet covers and sat up "Thats...not a bad idea actually" her brain started ticking "I know most of them live here in the city anyway. It's not too late to send invites"

"_And this idea hadn't already occurred to you yet?"_

Heather felt slightly stupid "Well...no. I'm not even on speaking terms with any of them anymore. I follow Lindsay on twitter for comedic value and sometimes catch LeShawna on the radio but thats about it. Plus there's the fact that most of them hate me"

There was a pause and Heather could practically hear the look she knew Alejandro was giving her through the phone right now. She rolled her eyes.

"Ok, _all_ of them hate me. There, that's a good reason this probably won't work"

"_It's worth a try. Plus, it might not matter that they hate you if you offer them access to the mansion your parents bought you and an open bar"_

Heather nodded "Alcohol _does_ solve a lot of life's problems. And my parents didn't buy this place for me, my grandma died and gave me a butt load of money"

_"Didn't you just say something about her and a rice paddy back in Korea?"_

"Not her, the other one"_  
_

"_ Oh, yeah, now I remember, the one You told me left you that money so you could go to college?"_

"Well, that's what I was meant to spend it on. But a down payment on a four bedroom, two bathroom house complete with pool and three space garage sounded better"

"_Your grandma must be proud"_

"Pretty sure she's too dead to care, but anyway. You have to get on a plane here to Toronto, right now...or at least by next friday. Bring as many Days of our lives cast members as you can. If you pass one of the Olsen twins in the airport, bring her with you, I don't care, just get your TV famous butt here"

"_What's your costume going to be?"_

"What? Oh, right, halloween. I'm going as Cruella DeVille, already got the Dalmation coat and everything"

"_A disney villain. Very fitting"_

"I know, I needed something hot and fabulous, but also gives off the impression that I'm willing to slaughter the innocent for a good outfit. It just captured my essence basically"

she heard him laugh under his breath through the phone and Heather smiled to herself.

"_It's going to be good seeing you again, you know"_

For a second heather didn't know what to say. She hadn't expected him to say anything like that. It was sweet.

She didn't cope well with sweet.

"I know, I'm damn delightful. Now hang up. I need to start sending some texts"

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"-And that gong means were nearing the end of the show ladies and gentlemen, with our last four remaining contestants now entering the lightning round! They'll have to answer a series of trivia questions, sent in by you viewers at home, while standing on a rotating platform and attempting to throw the golden darts at the prize balloons. If they hit the purple balloons, that's an extra ten points to their overall score, if they hit a yellow balloon, that minus five points, if they hit a red one, they're automatically eliminated from the game and if they hit a blue one...they get slimed at the end of the show! And remember folks, don't forget to send us your trivia questions by texting them to 1800-Chris-Macleans-Total-Drama-Knockout-GameShow-Fan-Trivia-Questions, and you could see it asked right here on the show! _Alltextscostfourdollarsfiftynomoneybackwithnoguaranteethatyourquestionwillbeaccepted n_ow lets take a look at the prizes that are up for grabs tonight with our own, lovely game assistant, Lindsay! "

The Camera that had been focused on Chris now panned over across the game show stage, where a partition raised up to reveal Lindsay, draped across a shiny red car, wearing an even shinier red dress. The audience let out an impressed 'oooh'. A fair few men in the audiences probably 'ooh'ed' for the wrong reason, earning glares from their wives.

"Thanks, Chris. Tonights runner up prizes will include two V.I.P. Passes to the exclusive Fairmont Royal hotel, as well as gift packs from St Tropez, with all the tanning products you could need" Lindsay announced with a flourish and the audience clapped.

"Well, those sound like terrific prizes, Lindsay, but I think what out contests and audience are _really_ interested in is that spiffy looking grand prize that's under you" Chris smiled cheesily into camera number three as the audience chuckled.

Just then, before Lindsay could continue the rehearsed banter between her and Chris, one of the current contestants, a twenty-something frat bro with a popped collar, reached across his podium to speak into his microphone.

"I wouldn't mind the prize of being under you, Lindsay" he said with a wink, laughing at his own joke. The audience hollered along.

Chris gave the wannabe comedian a tight lipped smile, as Lindsay glanced over to the stage director unsurely, but he waved his hand for her to keep going "I...uh...I'm sure they are, Chris. Who wouldn't want this brand new RCZ coupe, from...from"

Lindsay panicked under the spotlight. Crap, she'd forgotten her lines. What brand of car was it? She glanced down at the hood to check.

"Pyew-got!

Chris slapped his palm cards to his head.

"With this Pyew-gots uniquely designed roof and stunning, long, low profile, the result is a sporty and dynamic car that's just a dream to drive" Lindsays smile faltered as she noticed some of the audience laughing "Um... Complete with features such as LED lighting, four airbags and dual zone temperature control air conditioning, whoever walks away with this red hot car will be the envy of every-"

"Cut! Cut the cameras! Just cut!"

The background theme music that accompanied her bit was halted, and show assistants darted into action from behind the scenes, the audience started to chatter to bit her lip as the show's director trudged up onto the stage, massaging his temples.

"Lindsay, what the hell was that? A pyew-got? _A Pyew-got?"_

"It's the car...it's what it said" Lindsay pointed to wear it spelt out Puegot on the car.

"...purr-scho. It's prounounced purr-scho. It's french" The director said impatiently, as calmly as he could.

"Oh" Lindsay said, meekly "Sorry, I don't really know, like, car stuff"

"Yeah, well, you don't really know much about much, do ya'" He muttered to himself, not caring if Lindsay overheard him as he shuffled through papers in his clipboard "Look, I'm calling a fifteen minute break! " he called out to everyone in the studio "Someone get the makeup guys on the contestants. I want a lighting check on the slime stage, and can someone please get me a grande sized Caffe Americano , right this second. Seriously, if it's not in my hand in the next four minutes, someones getting fired!"

Lindsay sat there, dejectedly, as he stormed off, a flurry of interns and stage hands swarming after him, wanting to be the first person to hand him his Starbucks.

As Lindsay slid off the hood of the car and adjusted the slit in her ridiculously tight dress, she heard a low chuckle from behind her.

"Pyew-got?"

"Chris, it's not funny" she pouted as they walked together backstage "That's the third time this week he's yelled at me"

"That's the third time this week you screwed up a taping"

"Hey, last time wasn't my fault, you couldn't see it from where you were on stage, but that guy with the mullet grabbed my butt when he went to hug me and claim his prize!"

"And you jumped so bad you knocked over and broke the three thousand dollar, Swarovski limited edition, crystal Elephant"

"...it was a stupid prize anyway"

"It was, so who cares?"

"I care! It came out my pay cheque! And I just hate that he just...hates me. It's like all I do is annoy him"

As the two took their respective makeup chairs in the backstage area, Lindsay waited for Chris to reply. He was too busy fiddling with his hair, squinting into the mirror.

"Chris!"

"Sorry,What? Oh, are you waiting for me to assure you that he _doesn't_ think your annoying? Because he does. He thinks that a lot. I thought you just established picking up on that"

"Chris!"

"You know, as much as I love the sound of my own name being called out by a pretty girl, can't you just let it go?"

Lindsay looked close to tears at this point and Chris internally groaned as he looked into those ridiculously effective Bambi eyes.

"Lindsay, stop stressing about it. He hates everyone. He's a director in the reality TV circuit because he was never attractive enough to land an actual acting gig, and everyone knows his hair plugs aren't growing in right, and he probably has an ex-wife suing him for custody of some brat kid, or whatever, I don't actually know. I don't need to know, he's just a bitter little person and you can leave it at that" Chris waved it off like it was nothing "Hell, if I had a dollar for every director that hated me, I could go to McDonalds and order every item off the menu in one sitting"

This still didn't make Lindsay feel that much better.

"But what if I annoy him too much. What if he fires me?"

"He's not going to to fire you. You're his star power. Well, I'm his main star power, I'm basically carrying this crappy game show anyway, but you're what draws in all the hormonal pre-teen boys and lonely old bachelors who stop flicking channels when they see you sitting on top of a shiny car" Chris smiled at her, and Lindsay smiled unsurely back"Now, wheres that makeup girl? These crows feet aren't going to cover themselves"

Chris twisted in his chair and snapped his fingers, calling over a makeup artist, while Lindsay's mind still refused to settle.

"Chris? Am I talented?"

Chris raised an eyebrow at her as a girl dabbed concealer around his eyes.

"Of course you are"

"But what at? What makes me talented?"

"Um...you're very...good at sitting on cars?"

"Yeah, but, what else?"

"...You...have a lot of stage presence...your teeth are very shiny. You can do that swishy arm thing really well when you're presenting things"

"Well, thank you, but that's not so much what I mean"

"Then what _do_ you mean?" Chris said impatiently.

"I mean...was I just hired because I'm pretty?"

"...Kinda" Chris shrugged, being blunt about it "But that's what this job is, Lind's. This isn't NASA, this is day time television. When I was approached for this show and they were still casting for the 'prize girl', I was the one who suggested they hire you because I knew you could strut across a stage and look pretty. They weren't exactly looking for someone who could recite their sevens times tables or name fifty different types of european sports cars. That wasn't in the job description"

Lindsay flustered with her hair a little "...I know my sevens times tables.."

"Really? Whats eight times seven?"

"...I'm not going to dignify that with a response right now" Lindsay huffed and Chris laughed.

"Right, well, I'm off to go see how my hairs been looking in the playback. See you in five minutes" Chris said as he stood up, swatting the makeup girls brush away "And remember, purr as in cat, and scho, as in the name Joe with a French accent" he smirked as he left.

Lindsay stared dejectedly at herself in the mirror as the makeup girl turned on her, fixing at one or two fly away hairs with a comb, until a coffee was suddenly thrust under her nose.

"Ray!" Lindsay cried with a sudden burst of energy as she grabbed at the starbucks cup her friend, slash personal assistant, had handed her.

Well, technically he was Chris's assistant. But he liked Lindsay better. He'd told her so himself. In front of Chris.

"Hey, girl! Cinnamon Dolce Latte with two sugars and low fat skim milk, just for you" Ray smiled "and I drew a smiley face on the cup"

Lindsay swore she could have burst into tears over the caffeinated beverage.

"Oh my god, Ray, you don't know how much I needed this right now. I need cheering up"

"I guessed. I saw what happened with the car thing and I just knew director was going to go off on you. It's like I pre-empted the pick me up starbucks. I even managed to beat out the hordes of interns rushing to get him his Americano" Ray said as he stole Chris's seat.

"I hope they make it too hot and he burns his tongue" Lindsay said, as she licked off a bit of foam from her latte.

"Ooh, bitter Lindsay, she rarely makes an appearance" Ray smiled.

"Urgh, sorry. I shouldn't be all down about it. I already had a whine to Chris, and I think I managed to annoy him too"

Ray shushed her "Oh, whatever. He can be as grouchy as anyone when he wants to be. I should know. I was half an hour late with his dry cleaning yesterday and he told me my new Kalvin Klein V neck sweater made my neck look fat!"

Lindsay gasped "No, I loved that sweater! You look hot in it!"

"I know! My neck is as elegant as a swans! Besides, I told him right back that he was too old to wear jeans that skinny and I think I sent him into one of his mid-mid life crisis breakdowns again"

Lindsay couldn't help but smile "You're so bad"

"The diva deserved it"

Lindsay always laughed when Ray called Chris a 'Diva', which he did often. Ray made her laugh in general, with his constant bickering with Chris, acting more like a hen-pecking mother than the usual ass kissing assistant, even though he was ridiculously efficient when it came to actually running his schedule and running errends. Ever since Lindsay had met him they'd gotten along like a house on fire.

"Anyway, enough bitching about Chris, ask me how my date with Mark went last night"

"Ooh, how did you date with Mark go?" Lindsay clapped her hands excitedly.

"Terribly!" Ray smiled.

Lindsay's face fell "What? Why!? You've both been giving each other the eyes for, like, two weeks. Ive seen you!"

"Yeah I know, but now I've been on the date, figured out that he's actually drop dead boring, and now I can move and go to Liam's halloween party this friday without feeling guilty if I hook up with some hottie dressed as Robert Patterson from twilight" Ray explained like it was obvious.

"How do you know someone there's going to be dressed as Robert Patterson?"

"Sweetie, it's a gay halloween party. There are always, like, five Robert Patterson's. Some Jacobs too"

"Sound's like fun, could I go?"

"As if I wouldn't want you too! Of course you can come. I actually would have asked you earlier, but I kind of assumed you would be spending the holiday with you know who" Ray smiled suggestively and lindsays eye's widened.

"Ray! Shhh. People are around!" She said under her breath, glancing around the room.

"Oh, relax, nobodies listening. God, this whole 'secret' relationship thing is so hard to deal with sometimes. You know I've barely kept a secret for longer than an hour in my life. You're so lucky I love you, I'm actually dying to tell somebody"

"I'm serious, Ray, you know how crazy the tabloids would be if they found out. Besides, I...I wouldn't say we were exactly in a relationship right now. Not a full one"

Ray raised his eyebrows "You're sleeping together. You've been spending every other night at his place for the last month or two . You're toothbrush is in his bathroom. How much more can you be in a relationship?"

Lindsay bit at her nail a little "I dunno...it just...it doesn't feel that real when it's all under cover you know?"

Ray grabbed a hold of Lindsays hand sympathetically and she managed a smile for him, until a stage assistant strode into the dressing room, headset clasped to their ear.

"Ok, everyone, we're back filming in two minutes, everyone back in place"

"Whelp, back on to the car I go" Lindsay said as she smoothed out her dress as she stood up "Purr-scho, purr, scho, purr-scho.." she chanted under her breath.

"Good luck, you look fab!" Ray called after her. Then he remembered something he was meant to mention about ten minutes ago.

"Oh, crap!"

Lindsay turned back around.

"What?"

" I forgot. Your phone went off a little while ago. I think you missed a call, but I think they left a message too" Ray said as he dug around in his pants pocket to pull out Lindsay's pink be-jeweled I-phone.

Lindsay took it and checked her inbox just as the director was making the final call. Then she frowned.

Ray winced "Oh no, was it important? Was it about a waxing appointment or something?"

"Huh? Oh, no...it's...I think Heather just tried calling me"

At first it didn't click "Heather?" Ray frowned. Then his eyes widened "You mean _that_ Heather? From your 'Total Drama' days, Heather?"

Lindsay looked as surprised as him as she scrolled through the message"Yeah...something about a party..."

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Courtney sat tensely in one of the Law schools drab waiting rooms, watching the clock.

Her interviewer was three minutes late, So unprofessional, and she would have thought the university of Toronto could afford to buy some padded seats.

She quickly scanned over her hand written cue cards again, even though she'd already memorised them. Pointers on successful interviews. Stand up straight, maintain eye contact, give more than yes or no answers. Wear a casual blazer. A _fashionable_ casual blazer.

Then the door across the hall clicked open and her head shot up.

"Courtney?"

"Yes, that's me!" Courtney all but shouted in the dead quiet room, making a few other waiting students jump.

"Ah, good, it's nice to meet you. Step right in" The middle aged man in an olive coloured suit smiled kindly, holding the door open for her.

"It's nice to meet you too Mr. Douglas. I've been waiting for this meeting all week. I'm so glad you could fit me in on short notice" Courtney said as she took a seat in front of his desk , making sure to sit with her back as rigidly straight as it would go, quickly tucking her cards back in her purse.

"Hm, yes, well you were very...insistent" Mr. Douglas said dryly as he sat down as well "Now, you're interested in joining a law firm this summer on an internship, correct?"

"That is correct, sir"

"And what brand of law were you studying again?"

"Corporate law"

"Ah yes, here you are. Sorry, it takes some time for me to get used to the new students faces" Mr. Douglas tapped something into his computer "You did your undergraduate degree here at the university as well didn't you?"

"Yes, four years of legal studies. Would you like to have a look at my credits? I have a lot of credits. Oh, and a personal letter from my Administrative Law Professor saying how great I...I mean, it's a just a letter of recommendation"

"Hm, yes, I can see you have a very good grades record. High exam results too. You seem like the perfect candidate for internship. Just off the top of my head I can think of a few firms who would be glad to have you"

Courtney dared to look a little smug.

Now was the perfect time to launch into her prepared speech.

"That means so much that you think that, , I have to say, I'm more than ready to take on the challenges of being a real working corporate law environment, getting real world experience in my chosen field, and with my excellent communication and analytical skills, I think I could really-"

This went on for quite awhile. Courtney's roboticly practised speech that is. Ten solid minutes to be exact. She even went into her High school student council president days.

It was...tedious.

Mr. Douglas kind of drifted out a bit. He just stared and nodded. Then he found himself staring harder. He squinted through his glasses.

"I'm sorry, but do I know you from somewhere" He couldn't help but ask.

Courtney stopped, interrupted from telling her story about how she figured out a more convenient alternate case solution to one of the plots of a Law and Order episode than the one they had actually used.

"I...um...I don't think so sir. I've not been in one of your classes"

shook his head, vaguely "No, you definitely weren't, I would have remembered you straight away if you had...your Fathers not Jerry from the science department, is it?"

"...no?"

"No? Hm, alright then..." he frowned a little "I just can't shake the feeling I know your face from somewhere"

Courtney cringed inwardly.

"You don't happen to catch the number eighty four bus in the mornings do you?"

"no..."

"You don't have a part time job at one of the campus cafes do you?"

"No, sir..."

"Have you ever performed in something? One of the student productions?"

"Urgh, no..." Courtney sighed, losing her patience.

Mr. Douglas just sat back in his chair and frowned harder "Gosh, this is infuriating. I _know_ I know you from somewhere, something about your face and your voice but I just can't for the life of me think where from-"

Courtney snapped.

"I was on Total Drama, OK! I'm that Courtney girl from Total Drama!"

Mr. Douglas slammed his hand down on his desk "Yes! That's it! That's where I know you from!" he shouted happily while Courtney's politely enthusiastic interview smile had vanished completely, transformed into a tired glare.

Every other person she met just couldn't help but drag it up eventually. It's like the years on that show would never leave her.

"You know, I used to be rather addicted to Total Drama, actually. Well, my teenage daughters were and I just somehow got caught up in it myself. Say, you don't still speak to any of the other cast members do you? What about Duncan? Has anything ever happened between you and him since the show ended? I heard he has that show on MTV now"

Courtney then suffered through the next twenty minutes of her interview which had been completed turned around on her, with Mr. Douglas now asking _her_ the questions, none which were actually about the internship she wanted.

She ended up being escorted out with a very forced smile, as she said thank you and goodbye as promised to make some phone calls on her behalf and get back to her by the end of next week about the position.

As Courtney walked down and out to the fresh air of her university campus, heading in the general direction of anywhere that would have a working vending machine filled with snack chocolate she could gorge on, she felt like screaming.

She had wanted to come across as a mature and professional law student, not some...some washed up reality TV has-been! God, what if the sad old fan boy told all the law firms about who she was? She wouldn't even start there with a chance. Right from the get go she'll have all of _them_ asking her about her TV days. What it was like. Wether the show was rigged. What was Duncan actually in juvie for. She knew every nosy question, she'd been asked them all a million times.

Maybe right now she was just angry and paranoid, but the next person to pass her on the footpath stared a few seconds too long, and she glared at them. Just in case they were another looky loo who'd recognised her.

Seriously, the next person, Courtney didn't care who they were or if they were a professor or not, who reminded her of anything Total Drama related, was getting screamed at! _Loudly._

Just then, Courtney felt her blazer pocket vibrate. She grabbed out her phone and saw a new message.

Sender: Heather. Subject: TDI reunion halloween party!

Then Courtney really did scream.

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Gwen stared at her phone like she'd just swallowed a fly.

Was this a joke?

She'd been innocently sitting on her couch in her pyjamas at two in the afternoon watching old nineties sitcom re-runs, you know, the usual, and then out of nowhere..._this_?!

Nuh-uh. There was no way this was real. It _had_ to be a joke.

Gwen quickly flipped through to her address book to make a call. It only rang twice before picking up.

"_Hey, Gwen, whattsup?"_

"Le'shawna, did you get an invite to a halloween party from Heather recently?" Gwen said, no beating around the bush.

"_Uuuh, no? Why, did you?"_

"Yeah, just now, she texted me some invite. Its this friday"

"_What?"_

"I know, that was my reaction. So you didn't get anything?"

"_No. Does it seem legit? It might be some crazy fan trying to lure you to his basement"_

"Le'shawna, I haven't been anywhere near a camera in years. The most I get is a customer recognising me at work maybe once every couple of weeks"

"_Probably because your hair looks so different now. You look cute though, I saw your new profile pic"_

Gwen smiled "Thanks, but what should I do about this invite? Heather left her email address down the bottom and it's definitely her real one, I remember it from that stupid blog war thing we had and I used to send her hate mail. Plus it says open bar, and she says all the other TDI cast are already going. It'd be cool to see people like Bridgette and Cody, you know?"

She heard Le'shawna give a huff on the other end of the line _"Well, not all the old cast is going, obviously, since I didn't get an invite"_

"She's probably just still scared of you"

"_Don't try and make me feel better with flattery. Anyway, I can't go anyway. I've been invited to Usher's halloween party this year"_ Le'shawna said, proudly, and Gwen gasped_._

"Really? Usher's in Toronto right now?"

Not that Gwen could even name two of Usher's songs, but still, it was a pretty impressive name drop.

"_Apparently. My people told me his people got in contact with them, and I'm going this friday, it's gonna be huge, so sorry, Heather, I have better people to mingle with. I got a sexy little nurse costume to wear too. I know it's a total halloween cliché, but gotdamn if I don't look fine as hell in it"_

Gwen laughed "Wow, you're living the high life. I barely get out once a month these days. Last Saturday the highlight of my night was getting an extra wanton in my chinese take out dinner"

"_Yeah, but Clubbing's practically part of the job for me. You gotta' mingle, make connections. That's how we do business. You know how the music scene is" _

"I really don't. Broke artists who work late shifts at WalMart don't generally get invited to parties with Usher...I don't get invited to that many parties, period" Gwen groaned "Urgh, I kind of want to go now just so I don't feel like a pathetic shut in...but...it's still Heather. Are you sure you can't come, Le'Shawna? I'd feel a lot better about going if I had you as backup"

"_...are you seriously asking me to choose Heather over Usher right now? Because you know I love you, girl, but I don't love you that much"_

Gwen smirked "Maybe I'll just risk it alone then. Any night out is better than staying in and watching TV halloween specials while I eat my weight in cheap thrift store candy"

"_Plus, if the parties a bust, you could always just egg her house"_

"I like the way you think"

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"-But come on, man. Party! A halloween party! Candy and girls in cute outfits!_ We love candy and girls in cute outfits_"

"Cody, for the last time, exams are coming up, Halloween parties are always overrated, Heather hates us and gee, what's that other reason I can think of not to go? Oh yeah,_ I don't actually care_" Noah said without glancing up from his I.T. Text book as he wrote out revision notes.

Cody slumped down in the library chair, deflated. He exchanged a look with Owen, who just shrugged as he munched on a Kit Kat. He didn't actually go to University with them, but he lived near by, and Cody and Noah liked inviting him to their study sessions because he always bought so much snack food. Oh, and they were still such close friends since the show ended of course. That aswell as free Kit Kats.

"Told you he still wouldn't wannna' go" Owen said.

"Yeah, surprisingly, you guys bugging me all week hasn't changed my mind"

Cody groaned "But we have ages to study, Halloween's only for one night! Plus, party!"

"Just repeating the word party over and over again doesn't actually make a compelling argument"

"but Party!"

"_Shh!" _

Cody was interrupted by an angry library assistant as she glared at him from her desk. He gave a little apologetic wave. There was only more glaring.

"Besides, you barely study anyway-" he continued, voice lower "-so don't pull the 'Oh, I have so much cramming to do' card with me, I know you just stay up all night playing Sky Rim"

"Yeah, well, I'd still rather be doing that than partying with a bunch of people I haven't seen in four years. And you play just as much Sky Rim as me, don't get judgey"

"But don't you miss 'em? I think it'd be awesome to see everyone again. You guys ever watch that show Duncan's on now? Kickass?" Owen asked.

"What, the Jackass rip off ?" Noah scoffed.

"Yeah! On last weeks episode, he had to strap rockets to a pair of rollerblades, and then try go down this ten foot ramp over a pool full of jellyfish, it was insane!"

"Did he make it?" Cody asked.

"No! It was amazing! He got stung everywhere!"

Noah smirked a little "Maybe that is something I'd be interested in watching"

"All the episodes are on my hard drive, I'll bring it up to your dorm later"

"Do you have the new Game of thrones episodes?"

"Yeah, and I got the whole last season of How I Met Your Mother too, if you want to catch up"

"Nah, I'm good. I heard spoilers about the finale and I don't think I even want to watch it now"

"Oh, man, I know what you mean. I was so mad that Ted ended up with-"

"Guys!" Cody interrupted them both "As much as I would like to rant about that sucky finale right now, because I could actually go on for about an hour to be honest, it was that bad, but right now I wan't you to realise what a wasted opportunity it is to not go to Heather's party. All we do is study and hang out in our dorm room or at Owen's house watching TV, or playing Sky Rim, and for once where invited to do something cool and you guys are just gonna pass it up! We never go to the frat parties-"

"We're not invited to the frat parties" Noah deadpanned.

"I Don't actually go here" said Owen.

"-We don't go to bars or nightclubs"

"We hate bars and nightclubs"

"A bouncer called me tubby and my drink cost ten dollars"

Cody sighed "Come on, we need to go and do _something_ and we might as well start with this. We need to...get drunk and...and mack on some honeys and live it up a little!"

Noah and Owen stared at him.

"...'mack on some honeys'?" Noah repeated, frowning.

"...I heard some frat guy who sits behind me in my engineering lecture say it..."

"And you don't actually drink, sooo.." Owen trailed off.

"Hey, I occasionally add some Jack Daniels to my coke!"

"Yeah, this much Jacks-" Noah pinch his thumb and fore finger together "- and that much Coke" he joked, stretching his fingers "And what 'Honeys' will you be 'macking on' exactly? You want to try your luck with Lindsay? Maybe she'll be wearing the same red dress she wears on that dumb show she does with Chris now"

"Ooh, I have some episodes of that if you want them too. It's actually a pretty good show" Owen smiled.

"Or hey, maybe Sierra will be there, or better yet, Gwen, the girl who rejected you in favour of a guy who now jumps into tanks of jellyfish for a living"

Cody shrugged "Well...it _would_ be nice to see how she's doing..." he mumbled.

Noah laughed "Ha, yeah, maybe you can buy one of her angsty collage paintings with the garbage glued to the canvas, it'd look great next to your Pacific Rim poster in our dorm"

"Hey, her paintings aren't bad! The glued on garbage is a metaphor about the demise of modern pop culture"

Noah's teasing smirk dropped.

"Oh god. You want to go just to see Gwen again, don't you"

"No!" Cody said defensively "Not just Gwen. Everyone! To ...varying degrees. Catching up and...reminiscing. There's the whole nostalgia to it-"

"Oh my god" Owen said "It is Gwen, I can see it on your face"

Cody tried laughing "Guys, come on, I'm not just-"

"Is it because you can grow facial hair now? Because your voice has finally dropped? You think you have a better chance now. You're totally looking at this party as your second chance, Aren't you"

Cody paused before giving a little, tiny, nondescript shrug "...Maybe?"

Both Noah and Owen groaned.

"Don't go after girls who have already turned you down, man, that should be obvious"

"You're just setting yourself up for failure"

"Don't convince yourself this is a good idea"

"Trent and Duncan will still be there, It'll be awkward enough as it is"

"Don't do it"

"Trust us, just don't"

"Listen to us, Cody, we're your friends"

Cody couldn't help but smile to himself "But she looks so cute in her new facebook picture"

Noah let out a long resigned sigh that was half groan "Oh god, he's already face book stalked her. That's it. He's gone. We've lost him. This is happening, isn't it? You're already going with or without us, aren't you? You're begging me so much because you need me to be the responsible driver so you can go play cool stud and impress gwen with your 0.5% strong Jacks and coke in one hand and your 'mackin' honey's' attitude in the other"

Cody nodded.

Noah groaned more "Uuugggh, fine. But you have to buy me, like, ten subways...footlongs, too"

"Deal! You will have any lunch item, at any size you like, for the next two weeks

Cody sat there triumphantly as Noah settled into a disgruntled state of dealing with it, while Owen just smiled regardless.

"So...whose for matching outfits? I'm thinking Power Rangers"

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**A/N: I'll say outright that the characters are meant to be aged 23 at this point. Which maybe some people might find 'old' but really, it isn't. People in their twenties are basically still teenagers except they have a license to drink. Trust me. I know. Legally I'm classed as an adult but here I am eating kit kats for dinner and writing fiction about cartoon characters.**

**Chris's age has been changed though. Mostly because, when I started watching the show, I thought hr was maybe...twenty six, maybe as old as thirty. I also thought the other characters ranged more in ages, like I thought Beth was maybe fifteen and Lindsay was maybe nineteen "She's sixteen?! WITH THOSE?!") but I've since learned that canonically, Chris was about thirty five back then. Well, I'm changing it so that he's only about eleven years older than everyone. So old, but not...over forty hahaha. I'm sure ya'll don't mind, but just for expositions sake.**

**Yes, there are a few OC's as well. Brandi, Dennis and Ray. Don't worry though, they're their for story purposes, not to steal any attention away from our favourites.**

**Anyway, not much to say at the start of a story, all I can do is hope at least a couple people are interested : )**

**If you want, check out my deviantart for a pic I've drawn of what the girls all look like aged twenty three**

** art/TDI-girls-in-their-twenties-451293790?ga_submit_new=10%253A1398952955**


	2. Why would I dress for revenge?

Heather paced back and forth in her guest bedroom in her six inch Louboutin heels. She chewed at the end of the fake plastic cigarette holder she'd gotten off Ebay for five dollars plus shipping.

"None of them have arrived yet" she muttered.

"Don't worry, they'll be here" Alejandro called from behind the en-suite bathroom door.

"Other people have arrived. I have fifty guests here already and it's only eight. What time did I tell them to be here? I definitely said eight, right?"

"Yes" Alejandro said impatiently "Can you pass me my deodorant?"

Heather pulled a face "Like I don't have other things to do than help you get ready" she muttered, rifling through one of his travel bags.

He really had made it all the way from New York. He flew in yesterday and she'd picked him up from the airport. At first she'd been a little worried over letting him stay the night, wanting to avoid any awkward interactions, but so far...nothing. They were both on their best behaviour. They got a casual dinner, just as friends, he helped her put the finishing touches on the decorations the party planning company had delivered, just as friends, helped move the furniture back to make room for huge guest list, just as friends...and then they'd both said good night at eleven o'clock and went to their respective beds alone...just as friends would do.

It was all very friendly.

Or as friendly as Heather and Alejandro could ever manage.

"Here" she quickly yanked open the door and tossed the can of mens deodorant into the room, planning on shutting the door straight back again, to avoid possibly seeing even a trace of half dressed ex-boyfriend, but instead it bumped into something hard.

"Woah, easy, I'm coming out. I'm done" Alejandro said as he caught the can and walked through to his bed.

He was shirtless.

Heather clicked her tongue "You don't look done. A pair of Armani jeans don't count as a costume"

Alejandro shot her a look as he sprayed under his arms, grabbing a T-shirt from his bag "They could. What if I was dressing up as Justin?" he smirked.

Heather refused to let herself laugh "Oh god, _please_ tell me that isn't actually your costume because He's coming tonight, he was one of the only people to RSVP"

Alejandro scoffed "Of course he did. No one, who's anyone, _ever_ RSVP's"

"So did Bridgette and Geoff, and Tyler"

"My point still stands" he said, pulling on a black T-shirt "And shit, are Bridgette and Geoff still together?"

"Yeah, they got married I think, or they're engaged or whatever. She was talking to me about it for like half an hour when she called me a couple days ago, I kind of tuned out after she said she was coming"

"God, that's so weird...marrying the person you met when you were sixteen" Alejandro muttered as he dug into his bag again.

"Hmph, yeah, I can't even imagine that..." Heather turned away to fix her hair in the mirror, checking the white streaks she put in as part of her Cruella DeVille look "So, whens this costume making an appearance? Adding a black shirt to the jeans still isn't thrilling me"

Heather turned to Alejandro just in time to see him slip a pair of spotted dog ears onto his head.

She stopped cold.

"You're kidding"

"Woof" he wiggled his eyebrows.

"Oh god, you think you're really cute, don't you?"

Alejandro laughed as he stood up and slung an arm over her shoulder, pulling her close "Aw, come on. Matching costumes for the host and hostess"

"And since when were you co-hosting this party?" Heather raised an eyebrow "I'm paying for the rented bar and cater waiters. You're just the soap actor I brought here to impress people"

"You're so nice sometimes. I am impressive, I know, but I also like to think I'm here for moral support"

Heather rolled her eyes "I think I liked the shirtless costume better"

"Oh, really?" he smiled, and Heather was suddenly hyper aware of how close he was to her right now. She shrugged his arm off of her and stepped out to the door.

"Just don't tell people I was a part of planning the whole matching costume thing, I don't want them to think I had anything to do with your sad little two dollar costume"

Alejandro laughed as Heather opened the door, picking her spotted fur coat off the top of the dresser "And now I'm off to see if the pre-mixed cocktails are ready, so I don't have to watch you spend twenty minutes doing your hair"

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The cocktails were ready, and had actually been ready for the past hour, with no need to check on them. Heather had just decided they needed a little taste test. Immediately.

God, why did that man always do this.

It was like she could hear his stupid voice mocking her in her own head.

'Oh, anyone who marries the person they loved when they were sixteen is stupid, Heather, let me lean in real close to you _and wear a matching costume, Heather, let me just walk around shirtless, Heather'_

One of the hired waiters stared in silent awe as Heather downed a glass of Moscato and pineapple punch in one go.

I mean honestly, did he do this just to frustrate her? Why was it still even frustrating her at this point, they were just friends. This shouldn't be so frustrating.

"This is hardly strong enough. Fix up something with vodka in it for me" Heather instructed, putting the empty glass down on the tray.

As the waiter moved through the growing crowds, Heather heard a familiar shrieking sound.

"Oh my gosh, Heather, hiiii!"

"Sorry we're late! We didn't know how to work the GPS in Sadie's car properly, so we got a little lost"

"You mean _you _didn't know how to work the GPS, Katie"

"Same difference!"

Heather spotted them and pulled the waiter back by the back of his coat "Make that a double"

Then she turned on her 'Play nice' smile.

"Ooooh, heeeeey. How are you" she said as Katie and Sadie rushed over to give her hugs.

"We're good. We bought you wine!" Sadie said excitedly, holding up a bottle of what Heather could tell was a five dollar bottle of Chardonnay. The kind she didn't like.

"Wow...thanks. You didn't have to do that. I'll put it on ice"

More like it was getting tipped down the sink the first chance she got.

Sadie was in some kind of...well, Heather guessed it was a red riding hood costume. She had the little checkered dress, apron and red cape with knee socks. Surprisingly, Katie was not in exactly the same thing. She had on some gold leopard body suit, that showed a lot of leg, with some horrendously fluffy leopard print boots and matching eared hood.

The most surprising thing was their...actually not matching hair styles. Sadie had cut her hair into a short bob , and Katie had almost the complete opposite, her hair having grown out long and it was dead straight down her back.

It was almost disconcerting to see them so...un-coordinated.

"Woooow, your place is sooo big" Katie awed as she wandered in through the main foyer,looking like an extra in a Ke$ha video, glancing up at the mod chandelier, and then down at the shiny polished floors "I didn't know magazine writing paid so well"

"It doesn't, she was rich before anyway" Sadie said as she followed.

"Oh, that explains it. I think our entire apartment could fit in her driveway. Ooh, I love that lamp! That is a nice lamp"

"Ooh, yeah, I like that lamp too. Heather, where did you get this lamp?"

Heather shrugged as she attempted to detach herself from having this conversation "Um, I think it's. ah...I don't...I paid decorators, I didn't ask, and oh hey! That's the doorbell, I better go get that!" Heather said quickly, the door bell actually ringing as she hurried back down the hall.

"Ok! Talk to you later! Ooh, Sadie. Quick, lets get a selfie here, this hallway has really good lighting"

"Must be because of the lamp"

As Heather left them posing behind her, she waved off the guy she'd hired to open the door for guests so she could answer it herself.

The door opened and there stood a sexy nurse.

"HEEEEEYYY! LE'SHAWNA IN THE HOUSE, READY TO GET IT TURNT UP IN HE -wait, Heather, what the hell?"

Heather smiled politely at her "Oh, good, you made it"

Le'Shawna just stared, struck silent.

"Wha-?I...this is...what the hell? What are you doing at Usher's house? Am I at the right address" She stepped back and looked up the side of the house, the fear in her eyes growing.

"Hm, yeah, funny story. I kind of sent a fake email to your 'peeps' about Usher inviting you to his place, because I knew if I invited you to my party you wouldn't actually come. I'm really surprised this worked to be honest"

A vein above Le'Shawna's eye twitched.

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"-And _another _thing!" Le'Shawna all but yelled in the middle of the kitchen as she paused between sips of her Moscato pineapple punch, with Heather rubbing at her temples across the kitchen island, Sadie and Katie standing idly on the sidelines, and Alejandro subtly topping up Le'Shawna's glass when she wasn't looking, hoping that maybe she was a friendly drunk and it would help the situation.

"You would aaaallways be leaving your nasty makeup wipes around the bathroom without cleaning up after yourself! These things were always littered everywhere looking like they covered in clown paint! Like what? Privileged little rich girl don't even know what a bin looks like? Was the 'help' always there to clean up after you? Seriously, you were messy every single season, It used to piss me off so bad!"

Heather sighed. She'd been getting screamed at for the past fifteen minutes, first about the Usher thing, which yeah, she kind of expected and was perhaps a little...or a lot...justified, but I guess Le'Shawna wasn't done venting yet.

"You know-" Heather said, her patience wearing thin "-if you're really that mad at me, you are free to leave if you want too"

Le'Shawna licked off some of the sugar on the rim of her cocktail glass and shook her head "Aw, hell no, I spent sixty dollars on a taxi over here, I ain't about to spend another sixty dollars just going all the way back. Besides...I look cute as hell in this outfit"

"You really do" Sadie nodded.

"Yeah, I wanted to be a naughty nurse, and that was like my first idea when we we're brainstorming matching costumes, but Sadie didn't want to go along with it"

"That's because you wanted me to go as a cadaver"

Katie shrugged innocently as she sipped her cocktail "Yeah, but like... a sexy cadaver. It would have been cute"

"...Anyway" Le'Shawna continued "At least now I'll get to see my girl Gwen and everyone else. She's gonna' be surprised when she see's me though...damn embarrassing. Can't believe I thought I'd be dancin' on tables with Usher right now" she shot Heather another glare.

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"Driver roll up the partition pleeease, driver roll up the partition pleease, I don't need you seeing 'Yonce on her knees.." Lindsay mumbled along, singing to herself as she pressed the limo partition open and shut out of boredom.

"Do you have really to sing that every time you're in a limo?" Chris asked,looking up from his blackberry as he sat across from her.

"Yes" Lindsay smiled, buzzing it down again.

The passenger door opened and in stepped Ray, huffing and panting.

"Ok, here's your damn blazer, Chris. I can't believe you left it back at the studio" he muttered, Lindsay and Chris scooching over the long seat to make room for him as he got in.

"Well, excuse me if I thought this was the kind of thing having an assistant was for. To _assist _me" Chris said as he pulled the blazer on "You should be lucky you even get to come tonight"

"Excuse me, I am Lindsay's guest, she invited me"

"I thought you were going to some big gay bash, or whatever"

"Ok, 's probably not a good thing to call it, and B. I decided this was going to be more fun. Anyway, Why are _you_ going, I didn't hear you getting any texts from Heather?"

"I was the host of the whole damn show, I'm invited by default"

"Or did you not get any other invites to any other parties this year?"

"...Oh gee, I don't think this is the blazer I wanted to wear after all, I think I'm gonna' need you to run all the way back inside again and grab me my _other_ one" Chris smiled sadistically.

Ray narrowed his eyes "I don't get paid enough to deal with you"

Lindsay hummed inbetween them "Driver roll up the partition pleease~"

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Courtney walked up the driveway in her sensible flats, looking up at the modern mansion that she assumed must be Heathers, since it was the only house on the street with about fifteen cars parked out the front.

She fluffed up her ponytail and smoothed over her skirt.

Why was she nervous about seeing everyone again? Why did she even convince herself to come?

I mean, she'd given herself a little list of reasons as to why this wasn't so much of a bad idea.

She didn't hate everyone on the show. It wouldn't be too bad to see some of the girls.

She did actually like halloween parties in general. Maybe there would even be a costume contest she could win.

She knew Bridgette and Geoff were engaged through a facebook status some months ago, It'd be nice to congratulate them in person.

Alejandro was going to be there, and her Mom was addicted to Days of our lives, so if she could score an autograph for her without looking too much like a creep, that would be awesome.

She could show off how well she'd been doing lately, with her studies and high exam scores.

Plus her hair had been looking really cute lately.

Yeah, they were all little reasons that made this seem like an entirely good idea. But as Courtney pressed the door bell, all the bad reasons washed over her at once.

Duncan was going to be here.

So was Gwen.

But so was Duncan.

…..Ok, so they were the only bad reasons really, but they were pretty big ones, so they counted for a lot.

No one likes seeing an ex, no matter how long it's been. Or the girl who stole your ex. Or the ex who had gone on to have a successful TV career instead of ending up broke in the gutter or in prison, as was suspected of him. Just as Courtney was considering hightailing it straight back down the driveway to call back the cab she just got out of, the door opened, and Alejandro stood in front of her.

"Hi" He smiled, charming as ever.

"Hello!" Courtney squeaked.

Alejandro gave her a look and she cursed herself for sounding like a nervous pre-teen girl at her first high school social.

"Hey" Alejandro said as he stepped aside for her to come in "What's up, how have you been?"

"Good, good, just studying" she said as the door closed behind her "Obviously, I know what you've been up too" she laughed then winced.

Did that sound too creepy?

"I mean with the show. My Mom's a fan"

"Ah, right, tell her thank you then" Alejandro smiled at her as they walked towards the kitchen "Everyones in here, as you can see, already drinking"

"Courtney!" Katie squealed, spilling a little of her punch as she threw her hands up to wave.

"Uh, hi" Courtney said, spotting Heather and Le'Shawna as well "Long time no see"

"I know, girl, you look good. Love the hair, look's really cute"

_Knew it_, Courtney smiled.

Then Heathers voice reached her ears "And what are you meant to be exactly?...a nineteen fifties secretary?"

"Nice to see you again too, Heather" Courtney smiled "And I'm a school teacher, actually. It's a popular halloween costume"

Heather took in the knee length pencil skirt and starch white, tucked in, blouse, complete with glasses, and a calculator tucked into her pocket as accessories

"Oh my god, you even have the top button done up. Are those flat shoes?"

"My feet hurt in heels" Courtney frowned as she looked at Heathers fur coat and black satin dress "And what are you meant to be? A lady pimp? Or one of their ho's?"

Le'Shawna let out a laugh in the background.

"You know, it's like I can hear the insult, but it's not registering because it's coming from someone in tweed"

"Ooooh" Katie and Sadie chorused.

"Oh, ha ha. Well excuse me for not 'slutting up' my halloween costume, and actually going for something a little realistic. Plus, I have these to go along with it" Courtney pulled out a little tupperware container from her purse that she opened to reveal a whole bunch of little hand made pins that had big red letter 'F's on them "I'm going to go around pinning them to people's costume, because what's scarier than getting a failing grade?" she smiled, proud of her genius idea, like she dared them to suggest she was uncool now.

The girls stared at the tupperware container.

"That's...interesting" Heather said stiffly.

"Could you at least...I don't know...you couldn't un-pop a few buttons? Show off a little cleavage?"

"Le'Shawna!"

"What! Its halloween, nobody's allowed to judge you for it! Go ahead, show 'em off"

"There's a reason it's my favourite holiday" Alejandro muttered.

Sadie nodded "Yeah, it's like, the one night a year girls can get away with dressing like total skanks"

Katie looked on sympathetically "It's like she hasn't even seen mean girls..."

"Ok, I have seen Mean girls, what person that lives in the 21st century _hasn't_ seen Mean Girls? But whatever, I'm not-...I don't want to 'show anything off', I think I look fine" Courtney tried defending herself, but Heather wasn't hearing it.

"Well, you could look better. Come on, we're going up to my room. You're changing. Alejandro, watch the door. Girls, follow me"

"Hey, what-wait, let go of me! don't grab my arm-hey, that hurts!" Courtney protested as she was unceremoniously dragged back down the hall to the stairs, the others following.

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Courtney sat huffily on the edge of Heather's bed, while Heather was digging around the top of her walk in closet.

"I don't want a different costume. I like _my_ costume" She said stubbornly.

"Heard you the first three times you've said that sweetie" Heather called over her shoulder "Now what else do you want to be, a pirate? A witch? I have a cop outfit with fuzzy handcuffs and everything"

Courtney sneered "Can you disinfect them first?"

"No, it'll ruin the fur"

"Then keep them ten feet away from me, thanks"

Katie ran a hand longingly over the rows of expensive shoes Heather owned "Wow, Jimmy Choo's, Giuseppe Zannotti's, Red sole Louboutin's...I'm so jealous of everything in here!"

"Argh!" Sadie shrieked, clutching at a bright red handbag "She has a Birkin!"

Katie gasped like the Holy grail of fine leather goods had been unveiled "Oh my gosh, a _real Birkin"__  
_

"Ok, we're dressing up Courtney here, not you two. Shoo, out" Heather waved Katie and Sadie out of the wardrobe.

Katie plonked herself down on the bed besides Courtney as Sadie wandered over to look at the expensive brand makeup on Heathers vanity instead.

"You know, I would have thought you'd want to look more sexy" Katie said.

Courtney raised an eyebrow at Katie "Why?"

She shrugged "Because...Duncan"

Le'Shawna paused from rifling through some of Heather's desk draws to turn around "Yeah, can't say that didn't cross my mind too"

Courtneys jaw dropped "Urgh, please. Do you think I'm still interested? Because I'm not and it was a million years ago. Looking sexy for Duncan is just about the last thing I care about"

"Ok, but I didn't so much mean it _that_ way, I was thinking more like...hm, how do I say it?" Katie paused.

"You'd want to show him what he missed out on?" Le'Shawna finished for her and Katie snapped her fingers.

"Yeah, that's it!"

"What?" Courtney actually laughed .

"No, think about it" Said Le'Shawna "The whole thing with you guys years ago was a mess and he cheated on you, blah blah, everyone who owns a TV set knows how It went, but just imagine it. You show up years later at a Halloween party, looking sexy as hell, being all casual, fawned over by other guys while he's there, not getting a scrap of your attention" Le'Shawna painted the mental picture

"What girl doesn't want that kind of revenge?" Heather said over her shoulder.

Courtney's eyes narrowed "Why is everything always revenge with you?"

Heather shrugged "My court ordered therapist from a couple years back kept saying something about retailitory defense mechanisms, but I dunno, I drifted in and out on it all to be honest"

"...why did you have to to go to court ordered therapy?" Sadie asked.

"Oh, it was nothing really. A guy just took my parking space and I may have gotten out and attacked him slightly with my big deal. I didn't even draw blood"

Heather went back to rifling through her clothes.

"...Okaaay" Courtney said "Anyway, you guys, really. I'm over all the drama that came along with Duncan back on the show, so I'm not about to go stirring up anything now, so forget the whole 'revenge' idea, Ok?"

"Pfft, weak" Heather muttered, and was politely ignored. Mostly because Courtney could see an Umbrella hanging up on a coatrack nearby.

"But don't you wanna live, like, the ultimate reunions dream fantasy?" Said Katie "Like in the movies, when the nerdy girl nobody paid attention to in high school shows up in a hot dress without her braces on, and every bodies like 'daaaaayum', and the popular guy she used to like is all like 'woooooah', but she just ignores him because he was jerk anyway and she's too good for him now, and then she hooks up with her old best guy friend who _also_ got hot and lost his braces, because they were meant for each other from the beginning"

Katie smiled encouragingly. Courtney gave her a flat look.

"Plus, what if Gwen showed up looking super hot instead of you" Sadie added as she took the liberty of testing out one of Heather's Chanel lipsticks "Or worse, he brought along some new girlfriend? He's still on TV, he probably gets hot girls all the time"

"Yeah, you want to make him look like he downgraded rather than upgraded" Heather said, appearing with a few costumes flung over her arm for Courtney to try on.

Courtney fidgeted as all eyes we're on her.

She didn't like to think she was weak enough to be swayed by such shallow and petty arguments.

"Uh, well...I suppose looking good isn't really 'stirring anything up'"

But maybe she kind of was.

Le'Shawna's eyes brightened "So you're gonna' do it?"

Courtney looked pained "Urgh...yeah, ok, fine. But nothing too major! I still want to be a teacher, but I can wear a shorter skirt I guess, plus maybe some heels"

Heather dropped the costumes she was holding on the ground "Fabulous! I'll take what I can get. I knew you'd come around"

"Yeah, thanks to us" Le'Shawna had to throw in.

"I'll choose the shoes" Sadie said, dashing past Heather.

"Anything but my new Fendi stilettos! They're worth more than your months rent" Heather said to her, then frowned "Hey, did you just borrow my lipstick?"

"Well, you invited us into your home. I'd say that was an invitation to share makeup. That's what friends do" Sadie smiled.

"Hmm, yeah, friends" Heather smiled, picking up the lipstick and discreetly dropping it into her trashcan when she wasn't looking.

It had been tainted by the touch of the common bred.

"These ones, these ones, these ones!" Sadie said , back in a flash with a pair of hot red ankle-strap pumps.

Even courtney stared at them with a kind of awe with the other girls.

"They are pretty nice" Courtney admitted "Are we the same size though, Heather?"

"Are you an eight and a half?"

"Yeah"

"See? This is meant to be" Heather smiled "But if you scuff them even a little bit, you're paying for new ones. Which might result in you having to take out a small loan. I might also have to hit you"

"Got it"

"Ok, now a cute skirt. Take off that tweed monstrosity" Heather instructed as she went back to flip through hangers.

As Courtney started untucking her shirt to change, years of living with these girls in cramped cabins had obviously left them no room to feel embarrassed about dressing down in front of each other, Heather caught sight of a dress box behind the rack of clothes. A box she'd totally forgotten until now. Her secret dress up box.

"Oh my god, abort everything, change of plans" she said, making Courtney freeze awkwardly as her skirt lay around her ankles.

"What? What does that mean?"

Heather was about to explain with glee, but stopped when she caught sight of Courtney's underwear.

"Oh my god, they have bumblebee's on them" she said, staring at the yellow and white striped panties "Where do you even get those, I didn't know VS had a toddlers range"

Courtney frowned "They're from K-mart and I think they're cute. I have ones with lady bugs on them too"

"Tragic" Heather shook her head "Anyway, moving on"

The girls all stared as Heather knelt down to pull out the dress box, watching her open it and pull a couple of things out.

"Ok, so it's not a teachers outfit, but it is a school related one, so same difference" Heather smiled, holding upwhat turned out to be a small black and red check skirt, plus a tiny matching bustier vest and bra "It even comes with a little tie you can wear"

Courtney stared at it, offended, while Katie and Sadie stared wide eyed, and Le'Shawna let out a low whistle.

"Daaaamn, Heather, that is sexy. You gotta' tell me where you got that"

Courtney was less impressed.

"It looks like a stripper outfit! Heather, there is no way in _hell_ I am wearing that"

"Oh, come on, it's hot. I totally forgot I had it, but don't you think it's perfect?"

"For earning one dollar bills in maybe!"

"God, you're such a prude"

"I am not!" she looked towards Le'Shawna, Katie and Sadie for support "Guys,tell her I'm not a prude"

Katie and Sadie took a sudden interest at staring at the floor and Le'Shawna gave a little shrug.

Courtney gasped "Oh my god, you think_ I'm a prude?"_

"Just a little bit! It's not a bad thing, lots a girls are kinda' uncomfortable being sexy" Le'Shawna tried to sound supportive.

"A lot of Amish people and Mormons" Heather muttered.

"Oh, sure, because every other girl wants to dress up in a two dollar hooker outfit on Halloween"

Now Heather looked offended "This cost me seventy dollars, how dare you!"

"Why do you even have that in your closet anyway?!"

Heather gave her a look "I do my taxes in it, what do you think?"

Courtney gave the outfit the same look as she did the handcuffs.

"Nope. Not doing it. Not a chance. You should be glad I agreed to the different skirt and heels, this is too much"

Katie and Sadie pouted "But you would have looked so hot"

Le'Shawna nodded "Duncan would be trippin' over his own feet if he saw you in that..."

Courtney's expression didn't waver.

Heather gave in, dropping the school girl outfit back into the box "Fine, be a little Amish buzzkill, buzz around in your little bee panties, I don't care. I'll get you one of my leather pencil skirts, and _at least_ roll up your sleeves a little. We can't completely un-frump you, but we've made some headway"

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As Courtney left the girls back up in Heathers room and descended the stairs again, more carefully since she was in these ridiculously high heels and tight skirt this time, she couldn't believe their nerve.

She wasn't frumpy! She read Cosmopolitain! She shopped at Banana Republic! And Courtney was most definitely not a prude. What was their definition of a prude anyway?

One time, when she was holidaying in Europe last summer, Courtney even un-did the back of her bikini top when she was tanning on the beach one time, so she wouldn't get tan lines. See? Totally un-prudey.

Well, the nudist beach had been fifty metres down the coast, I guess that would have been the _least _prudey option but, hey, baby steps. Besides the French were on a whole other level of un-prudeyness, you can't just jump straight into that.

Oh, and one time, she let a guy get some over the sweater action on their third date. Yeah. She hadn't even met his parents yet. Never even did.

Besides, Courtney may like getting other peoples attention, but not in _that_ way, and she would have stuck out like a sore thumb in that tiny excuse of an outfit.

Courtney had to stop at the bottom of the stairs to let a pair of girls pass through the hall, one in a tiny french maid dress and the other in what Courtney assumed was a cheap Lady Gaga costume, but really it was basically just vinyl hot pants and a spiky bra covered in glitter.

Ok, so maybe she would have blended right in. The most covered girl she could spot was in a Winnie the Pooh Onesie.

She grabbed a drink off a tray as she walked past one of the waiters, saying a quick thank you as she mingled in the crowd, craning her neck for anyone else she might know.

Turns out she didn't need to look for long.

"Bridgette!"

She may have been dressed as Cinderella, but Courtney recognised her and Geoff instantly in the crowd, and the blonde turned around as she heard her name called.

"Court!" She beamed, throwing her arms around her in a hug "Oh my god, it's so good to see walked past Alejandro when we came in but we thought no one else we knew was here yet"

"We've just kind of been standing around, not knowing anyone. Awkward" Geoff laughed, dressed as the crocodile hunter, giant inflatable alligator under his arm and everything.

"Oh, people are here, they're just upstairs" Courtney said, giving a quick side hug to Geoff "Oh, let me see your ring!"

Bridgette stuck out her hand "What, this old thing?"

Courtney shrieked when she saw the silver engagement ring on her finger, clasping at her hand to get a closer look "Wow, it's so pretty! I love that it's a blue stone, is it a real sapphire?"

Geoff nodded, proudly "Yup, she's worth every penny though" as he hugged Bridgette close to his side.

"Aw, I'm so happy for you guys. When's the wedding?"

"We're thinking maybe next year in August"

"Yeah, that's when the flights to Vegas are the cheapest, plus thats when the Elvis impersonator we want to be the minister for the ceremony is free" Geoff nodded.

Courtney's smile slipped a little "O-oh, that sounds... nice"

Bridgette rolled her eyes "He's kidding. He's been saying that to everyone. We're having a beach side ceremony"

"Oh!" Courtney laughed "God, for a second I actually believed it, but Yeah, that's definitely so you , I bet it's going to be beautiful"

"Thanks, we hope it is"

As Bridgette started going more into detail about her plans for the décor and her dress, Courtney noticed something in the corner of her eye as she listened. People had started to crowd together a little more over across the room, and she could hear a sudden rise in laughter. Someone had obviously just arrived.

Then she heard it.

That familiar full-of-itself laugh, and her smile went tight.

Then the girl dressed like the cheap Lady Gaga stepped aside a little, and as her giant wig moved with her, Courtney caught a clear glimpse of Duncan himself.

She tried to stay focused on her conversation with Bridgette, but she could hear him moving closer, Laughing as he greeted people. They probably all recognised him from that new show of his.

"-And I don't know if we should do a sit down dinner or not, or maybe just a buffet, since that's going to work out cheaper-"

"Uh huh, uh huh" Courtney nodded along, barely listening as she kept a side eye'd glance towards Duncan.

"-And I mean really, then people can just eat what they like, and plus the cake is the main thing to me really but I don't know if it should be vanilla or chocolate, because I like chocolate but is that really suitable for a wedding, you know what I mean?"

Courtney could see him clearly now, even if his back was turned. Couldn't figure out his costume though. He was in a grey hoodie, jeans and...holding an umbrella? Whatever. Maybe he just thought it would rain tonight. He was exactly the type to think he was too cool for a costume anyway.

As he moved with the crowd she could strain her ears to listen in to snippets of what he was saying.

"-yeah, decided to come. There go my plans of egging every house on my street. I live down the road from one of those guys from Glee. He got lucky-"

"-My show's halloween special is actually airing tonight, you'd all better watch it-"

"-You don't know what my costume is? Come on man, I'm not telling, you've gotta guess"

It was all pretty general stuff, but then Courtney noticed a girl in a devil costume, little red and black crop top and tight black jeans, with the pointy horns perched on her head. She was pretty...and she was standing very close to Duncan.

"-oh, sorry, and this is Gina"

Courtney couldn't stop herself from staring as she saw Duncan sling an arm around this girl, this 'Gina', as he introduced her to some one. The girl smiled, with perfect teeth and a flutter of dark lashes as she shook their hand, saying a polite hello. Courtney could spot at least two tattoo's on her, one across her arm and the other down the small of her back. A tramp stamp if ever she saw one. She had one of those sweet, husky voices.

"I guess you could say she's my date for the evening. Sucks to be me, right?" Duncan laughed, and 'Gina' rolled her eyes with a laugh of her own, throwing back her hair as she did.

You know the sound effect of the gavel they do in the opening to every Law and Order episode? The 'thunk-thunk'?

Well, Courtney's mind was little more than the 'Thunk-thunk' sounding off in her head as she stared, expressionless.

"Court? Courtney?" Bridgette frowned.

Courtney snapped back to attention "Sorry, what?"

"Are you alright? You look..off"

Courtney grinned widely to show that everything was fine and she was fine and nothing was 'thunk-thunking' in her head at all.

"Yeah. I mean, no. I'm not off, I'm fine. Fine"

"Are you sure? I'm not boring you with wedding stuff am I? Because I never thought I'd be this person, but it's crazy how quickly it just takes you over and-"

Courtney's eyes drifted back over to Duncan and his 'date for the evening' and her impossibly pushed up boobs, that were either surgically enhanced or aided with the power of two push up bra's and some inflatable inserts.

But just then, Gina herself happened to turn around, and the two girls locked eyes.

Courtney whipped her head back around at the speed of light, side stepping back so she was hidden from sight by Bridgette, Geoff and his giant inflatable alligator.

"Oh, hey, hold that thought, sorry, I had one of those cocktails earlier, and you know how I am. Bladder the size of a Walnut. Gotta go find the ladies room!" Courtney laughed a little too high pitched to sound convincingly casual as she darted back down the hall "Be back in a sec!"

Bridgette and Geoff didn't even have time to reply as Courtney all but run back down the hall, crouching behind strangers as she ducked and weaved, not very gracefully in those heels.

"Babe, did she mention what her costume was? I can't figure it out"

Bridgette shrugged as they watched her dissapear "I dunno...she had a calculator in her pocket. Plus the glasses...Maybe an accountant?"

Geoff shrugged his shoulders "Yeah, seems like a pretty Courtney thing to do"

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"Le'shawna, stop going through my things!"

Le'Shawna stepped away from the desk drawer as it was slammed closed by Heather.

"Ooh, ok then, precious. Not that I didn't already see the Mary-Kate and Ashley mystery novel with a very recent looking bookmark in it..."

Heather narrowed her eyes "You tell no one"

"I'll be telling everyone"

Just then, the door to Heathers room burst open, with Heather, Le'Shawna, Katie and Sadie staring wide eyed as a huffing and panting Courtney stared right back at them with the face of determination.

She brushed the hair out of her eyes and stood up tall, mustering all the dignity she had left.

"Get me that school girl outfit"

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As Gwen arrived at Heathers, she was glad about her choice of sensible shoes, watching as a pair of girls attempted to walk across the un-even lawn with towering heels and spindly little legs. They were pretty and fashionable looking. They could have been models, maybe. One shrieked and toppled over, pulling her friend with her, with even more shrieking.

A beautiful sight. Like watching giraffes on animal planet.

And who said glitterazi parties couldn't be fun?

Her costume for tonight was handmade. The dress was an old spaghetti strapped wedding gown she'd gotten from a second hand shop, and she'd cut the skirt short and raggedy, leaving rips in the tulle. Then she'd splattered fake blood all over in drips, with one big stab wound over her heart. Add a little smeared eye makeup and tastefully dishevelled hair and she looked like a fabulously dead bride. Gwen had even come up with the backstory about marrying into the mob of a rival family, then being assassinated in a fit of passion by her own sister, who saw her as a betrayer, but was also secretly in love with her soon to be husband herself. It was all very dramatic.

Really, if she wasn't an artist, she should be a writer.

Alejandro answered the door bell when she rang.

"Gwen! So good to see you!" he said immediately.

"Yeah, same to you" Gwen said as she let him guide her in.

God, he was even more good looking than he used to be. Maybe she'd have to start tuning into Days of our Lives just to gaze at that jaw line.

Ha. Yeah right. She'd rather watch a twenty-four hour long repeated loop of Justin Bieber puking on stage at his own concert.

Ooh, actually, mental note: consider that for next instalment art piece for upcoming exhibition.

"Are those girls out there ok?" Alejandro peered over her head back out to the lawn, where the giraffes were still struggling.

"Eh, they're good, they're delicate creatures who shouldn't be disturbed in their natural habitat"

"What?"

"Nothing. Come on, show me to the snack table so I can scope out the best spot to stand mutely in for the next five hours"

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"Wow, there are a lot of people here" Cody marvelled, as he led Noah and Owen in through the front door.

"And check this place out! How does Heather afford this? Everything's so shiny and cream coloured" Owen said.

"Daddy's money probably went along way" Noah muttered, grabbing a spring roll off the first tray off horderves that went by him. Owen did the same but grabbed about eight.

"Cool decorations too" Cody said, eying up all the fake spider webs covering the staircase bannister, and small toy bats hanging from the ceiling. He took a second to adjust his collar "Ok, hows my costume look? Is my hair still good?"

"If by good, do you mean 'It won't move if I touch it?" Noah said, flicking Cody's gelled up hair.

"Hey, hey, don't mess it up" Cody stepped back "It took me ages to get the Robert Patterson hair working for me, I had to watch a youtube tutorial video"

"Did you have to watch a tutorial video on how to apply all that body glitter too?"

"It's from the movie, the vampires skin sparkles in the sun"

"Well, now the inside of my car sparkles like the sun. You're shedding that stuff everywhere"

"I didn't think you even liked Twilight. I didn't think _anybody _still liked Twilight" Owen said through a mouthful of spring rolls.

"I don't. It's a parody costume" Cody explained that like it was obvious.

"And is Gwen going to know that straight away or will she just assume you have the movie taste of a fourteen year old girl?"

"Yeah, well, it's better than your costume. Steve Jobs? No one's even going to get that"

"They don't have to get it. I'm just going to find a place to sit around in my black mock turtleneck and mess around on my phone all night, ignoring all the drunk and irritating people" Noah smiled, holding up his I-phone.

"But you're not even in a mock turtleneck, it's just a plain shirt"

"Yeah, well, an actual mock turtleneck would have cost me thirty dollars and I really wasn't that committed"

"You don't say"

"Everyone's going to get my costume!" Owen smiled.

Cody looked up at him "...well, yeah, you're just wearing a Power Rangers T-shirt"

"It say's mighty Morphin Power Rangers right on there" Added Noah.

Owen slumped a little "They didn't have the costume's in my size at Target"

"That tend's to happen in the kids section"

Cody shot Noah a look before turning back to Owen "Don't worry man, you look cool"

Then the three of them heard a shriek that made half the party jump, as a yellow and red blur launched itself onto Owen.

"OWEN!" The voice shrieked again, now attached to Owen via an unwarranted piggyback ride.

"IZZY!" Owen shrieked back, realising who it was.

She was dressed in an oversized Winnie the Pooh onesie.

"You look awesome" Owen smiled as she dropped off to the floor again.

"Says the guy in the Power Ranger costume. Even _more_ awesome" She said before looking back at Cody and Noah "And what are you two meant to be?" she squinted at Cody "Are you wearing stripper glitter?" and Noah let out a bark of laughter.

Cody sighed "I knew I should've gone as a pirate"

Izzy pulled a face "Ew, no, I've seen like three Johnny Depp wannabe's already. I think your stripper outfit look's cute"

"But I'm not-!"

"Anyway, what've you guys been doing! What's up, what's been happening?!"

"Well, I'm still living with my Mom and I've worked at the local Deli for over two years straight now. It's great...I even get to eat the scrap meat from when we shave the leg ham. You could say it's a job with some pretty sweet perks"

Izzy nodded wisely "It's so good to see someone find their purpose" she turned to Noah and Cody again, indicating it was their turn to speak again.

"Oh, we're just at college. last year" Noah said "I'm doing I.T"

"I'm doing Engineering"

"...Oh. Boring"

Noah and Cody exchanged glances.

"What've you been doing, Iz?" Owen asked, and Izzy took a deep breath.

"Hmm, what've I been doing? I've been doing quite a bit actually" she said, looking like she was racking her brain "Lets see, Um, so for awhile I had a youtube channel and that was pretty successful. I put up sixty two individual videos of me doing the cinnamon challenge in different hats. Then at one point I was the stage director of a travelling flea circus, and during that time I also founded a non-profit charity organisation that knitted sweaters for cold blooded reptiles, and some, but not all, amphibians. I did some travelling after that. Saw Budabest, did Amsterdam, back packed through the Ukraine for a little bit, was held in an internment camp in the Ukraine for a little bit,... became a bit of a wanted fugitive in the Ukraine for a little bit, but that all got sorted out when I had a short affair with the son of the head of the American Embassy. Oh, and I had my name legally changed to Paris Hilton, because I thought some job opportunities might come out of that, but nothing really panned out, and I still got kicked out of the hotel air vents I'd been squatting in for the past month and a half. It's still my legal name though, but you guys can still call me Izzy"

She paused and all three boys just stared.

"Oh, and right now I'm taking a Jewellery making course" she finished with a smile.

Noah managed a smile back "Oh, cool, that one sounds... actually normal"

"Yeah" Izzy nodded "I make friendship bracelets for spiders"

**A/N: Hey guys! So, there wasn't much in the authors comment last chapter, but I thought I may as well see if anyones actually interested in this fic at all before launching into a rant. Thankfully, more than 3.5 people are interested, so my expectations have already been exceeded! Honestly, I thought i'd doomed myself to failure for not specifying the couples on the front page. Because about that. I'm not specifying nuthin'.**

**Well, except for the fact that Bridgette and Geoff are engaged. And Cody is interested in Gwen. And Heather and Alejandro have their thing. And Lindsay is in a covert relationship, and obviously there is still drama stirring between Courtney and Duncan and who knows how that will mix with Gwen, Trent, cody and now this mysterious new Gina...but besides all that, _totally not-specified._ **

**I'll just say now that there will be canon and non-canon relationships. I've never really been a part of the TDI fandom, so I don't know what's really popular and what's really _not_, so I'm just gonna write the relationships that make sense to me and hope I write them in a way that makes you nod and say 'Yeah, I can see that. That came flying out of nowhere, but I can dig it'**


	3. What's in Guatemala?

"Is it too short at the back? It feels too short at the back"

"Courtney it looks fine"

"I still think it would have looked good with a singlet underneath the vest. I feel like my mid-driff shouldn't be this exposed. Right now it's all 'Hello, look at me! Courtney has an innie!'"

"You know, the key to wearing things like this is to just act confident. Walk a little taller, shoulders back, strut like your the baddest, most hottest bitch in the room" Le'Shawna said.

"Yeah, like how we walk everywhere" Heather added.

"What if I wore a cardigan over the top? I don't think that will ruin the look"

Heather and Le'Shawna ignored her.

"What if I just tied it around my waist? That practically compliments the whole school girl look. Please? I really think if I bend down even a little bit everyone's gonna get a look at my-"

"Courtney?"

"Heeeyy, Duncan!" Courtney spun around in surprise to come face to face with her very shocked looking ex-boyfriend, and the girl who was still stuck to his side.

Courtney smiled with a little too much teeth and toned it down, putting a hand on her hip. No, scratch that, too posey. She dropped it again. Crap, what should she do with her hands? Ok, no, back on the hips they go. Confident. Like she was the baddest, most hottest bitch in this room. _Work the pose._

"You look, ah...your hair's nice. Look's different in a ponytail" Said Duncan.

"Yeah, thanks, your hair looks different too, it's not...there's less green"

"Yeah, it was for work. You know how strict those suits are at the MTV head office"

"Oh, really?"

"No, that was a joke. It's MTV. I could probably grow white boy dreads and put skull beads in the ends and they wouldn't care"

"Oh my god, please don't actually do that" the girl in the devil costume, the so called 'Gina' laughed, putting a hand on Duncan's shoulder and he smiled at her.

"Why, does that seem like something I would do?" Duncan smirked at her.

"It seems like something you would do just to mess with your fangirls"

"Oh my god, I could see the message boards now"

Courtney watched as they both laughed with each other and she noticed Heather and Le'Shawna give her worried glances. Courtney made sure to laugh along to assure them she was fine, this was fine and everything was fine.

"You have fangirls?" Heather asked doubtfully, unable to stop herself.

Le'Shawna shrugged "Hey, if Cody could get them"

"Yeah, like, one dedicated little group. You'd think that wouldn't be enough to go to his head, but it does. You should see how he is with them on twitter" Gina said.

Courtney made a mental note to stalk his twitter.

She also made a mental note to actually bother to make her own twitter first.

"So, ah, Duncan" Gina elbowed him lightly "Are you going to introduce me?"

"Oh, right. Courtney, this is Gina" Duncan stepped aside as Gina stuck out her hand.

"Nice to meet you" she smiled sweetly.

Courtney attempted to smile even more sweetly as she took her hand to shake "Nice to meet you too, I'm Courtney"

"Um, yeah, I know. Because of the show and everything"

"What? What show, I'm not on a show?" Courtney frowned.

"No, I mean Total drama. I remember you"

"Oh! Yeah! I was on that show!" Courtney laughed, mentally screaming in her head as Gina exchanged glances with Duncan.

Way to sound less like an undergraduate law student and more like a Lindsay. Quick change the subject. Talk about the weather. No, that's boring. Quick think of something, the silence is going on too long, you're smiling too awkwardly. Talk about your costumes!

"I like your costume!" Courtney managed to spit out eventually.

"Oh, thanks! I like yours too! The naughty school girl look, very hot" Gina gave her a thumbs up and a wink.

Courtney suddenly felt like she was joking, making fun of her, but she laughed along anyway, feeling like she could have happily grabbed Heathers huge coat off of her, wrap up in it, and run away to hide in the closet full of shoes, stuffing herself back in the dress box along with this stupid idea of an outfit.

"Thanks, you look really hot too" Courtney smiled.

Anything would look hot with those boobs. This girl could wear a hessian sack stapled together around her torso and still look hot.

As Courtney stopped herself from staring enviously at Gina's cleavage for too long, it was back to the silence.

Le'Shawna leant over to mutter in Heathers ear between the two of them "_This is the most uncomfortable conversation I can even imagine"_

"_I know and I am living for it"_ she muttered back.

Le'Shawna, however, felt the need to intervene.

"So, Duncan, whats your costume meant to be? I've been trying to think of what you are for the last five minutes, but I'm still blank"

Duncan smirked as he held up the umbrella "I'm Britney Spears circa 2007"

"Ooooh" the girls chorused.

"Tasteful" Heather eyed him up and down "Did you dig through your wardrobe for five whole minutes before you left the house tonight?"

"It was probably more like two minutes actually. Did you skin all those puppies by hand?" he gestured to her coat.

Gina gave him a little nudge again "Duncan, you said you were gonna play nice"

"I also said I wasn't going to drink too much tonight, but here I am, already going back to the bar. I say a lot of things" Duncan said, holding up his empty glass "Come on, lets go get another drink. Ladies" he nodded a quick goodbye as he all but grabbed Gina and pulled her away.

"Nice meeting you guys, I'll see you later!" Gina called over her shoulder as they left.

"Yeah, definitely!" courtney called back, waving. Then shooting her hand back down, realising waving probably wasn't what a hot, bad bitch would do.

Then she gave a deep sigh of relief as she turned back to Heather and Le'Shawna "Ok, that wen't pretty well I think"

Heather and Le'Shawna stared.

"...I'm sorry, were we watching a different conversation?"

"Yeah, that was a train wreck" Heather nodded sadly.

"What! No...no, it wasn't that bad...I mean, yeah, there we're some awkward pauses but-"

"What happened to the plan!" Heather snapped "I wanted to see you strut out in front of him, looking like some hot school girl fantasy, making him walk into a wall in front of his new girlfriend, that he probably paid to come along with him anyway, and then when he calls out your name in a hotness induced stupor, you just turn around, pouting, batting your eyelashes, like 'Oh, Duncan? I didn't see you there. Hi', cue the sassy hair flip, and while he rambles on about whatever dull, stupid thing you just cut him off and say you have somewhere else to be, and then grab the closest Johnny Depp pirate that's walking around and make out with him!"

Courtney blinked "...I don't actually remember being briefed on that plan"

Heather groaned "It was _implied._ It what _I_ would have done"

"Well, my plan is more subtle than that. I just want to go about my business at this party, have a good time, make him kick himself for ever cheating on me and ruining our relationship because, damn, I look like a confident young women who has her shit together, and who's hair is super cute ,and who is about to get an internship at a prestigious law firm based on her intellectual talents, with a 3.8 GPA, and hard work!"

"...so what was the point of the outfit?"

"...It doesn't hurt to look really, really hot while doing it" Courtney huffed "Now, if you'll excuse me. I'm going to the buffet table. I can see mini quiches"

As Heather and Le'Shawna parted to let her breeze past, they both had looks on their faces that said they knew better.

"That Gina girl has her on edge" Le'Shawna said as soon as she was out of ear shot.

"Yeah, no shit"

"How do you think this is gonna go down tonight?"

"Dunno'. There might be petty name calling, an actual cat fight, cheating..." Heather shrugged "Either way it's going to be my entertainment for tonight"

Just then she felt a tap on her shoulder, and she whipped around to see Alejandro.

"Hey, has someone else arrived?"

"A lot of people, actually" he said.

"Anyone relevant in anyway?"

"Well, Trent's here and he brought his guitar, I didn't ask what obscure musician he was dressed as because I didn't care. Justin's here ,Sierra got here maybe ten minutes ago, I think she's off talking to Bridgette about her wedding or whatever, plus I saw Harold, Eva, Ezekial, Beth-"

"Ezekial? Beth? What are they doing here, I didn't want them here?" Heather sneered "They're not famous, they haven't done anything with their lives"

Le'Shawna side eyed her "Wait, what?"

"I mean, uh...no, it'll be great to see them. I'm sure they've gone places" Heather smiled quickly.

"I still have't seen those work friends of yours yet, what time did they say they'd be here?" Alejandro asked Heather.

"Well, I told them to be here by eight o'clock sharp, so of course that means they'll probably show up around nine to be fashionably late. I wanted everyone else already here before they arrived, make the place looked packed and fun and full of my successful friends"

"And when did I say you were my friend?" Le'Shawna raised an eyebrow.

"And when did I say you were successful?" Heather shot back.

Alejandro frowned as he watched Courtney across the room "You know, that outfit looks really familiar"

Le'Shawna raised ay eyebrow at Heather, who sipped innocently on her drink.

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"Hello and welcome to the-"

"HI HEATHER!-wait, no, you're not Heather?" Lindsay stared at the hired door hand as she stood by the doorbell with Chris and Ray "Are we at the right house?"

"Ah, yes, this is her party. Heathers party" the young guy smiled nervously, stumbling over his words as he let them in, no doubt recognising who they were "May I take your coats?"

"Yeah, sure, thanks" Chris said, taking off his blazer and handing it to him.

Ray's mouth hung open "Really? _Really? _I run laps around the studio fetching you blazers and you're not even going to wear it?" he hissed.

Chris smiled "Consider it good exercise"

As Ray had to take a few deep, calming breaths, the doorman approached Lindsay.

"And would you like me to take your coat too?"

"Oh, thank you" she smiled as she unbuttoned her burberry trench coat and shrugged it off to reveal a bright red playboy bunny suit, complete with puffy tail. She whipped a pair of bunny ears out of her purse and placed them neatly on her head.

The poor door man probably wasn't ready for it. His knuckles turned white he was gripping those coats so hard, his eyes bugging out of his head as he stared Lindsay up and down.

"Down boy" Chris muttered, snapping him out of it.

"Er, yes! Sorry, thank you, I mean, um- have a nice day. I mean, night" he managed to stammer out.

"Thanks, you too!" Lindsay smiled, blissfully un-aware that she had just made another waiter walk into a wall across the room.

As Chris, Lindsay and Ray ventured into the actual party, Ray was just gaping at Lindsay's choice of outfit, but for a different set of reasons, obviously.

"Oh my god, Linds! Where did you get this outfit? Don't get me wrong, you look hot enough to turn me straight, but what happened to the witch costume we bought the other day? You had the toy owl and everything"

"I lost it!"

Ray gasped "You lost Hedwig!?"

"Oh, no, he's still safe at my apartment. I meant my costume!"

"What? How did you lose it? I thought it was hanging up in your dressing room"

Lindsay shrugged "I thought it was too, but when I went to go get ready for the party after we stopped filming, I couldn't find it anywhere. It wasn't in any of my bags, or under the couch cushions. I even looked in the mini fridge. I was like, so upset because I thought I wouldn't have anything cute to wear"

"So where'd you get this thing from? Just hanging around? You naughty girl, you" Ray fluffed at her tail a little bit, making her laugh.

"Ray!" she slapped him away "No, it's not mine. Chris found it for me"

Ray's eyes narrowed as he turned his head slowly towards Chris "Oh, did he really now?"

Chris shrugged innocently "What's the point of having a studio costume department if you can't dip in and borrow from it occasionally?"

"And I guess you couldn't dip in and find any, oh, I don't know...nun costumes or something like that?"

"Ah, yes, the nun costume. A staple of so many TV gameshows"

"Chris"

"You know , there actually wasn't that many costumes to choose from down there. The pickings were slim. It was either the bunny suit, or a giant lobster costume leftover from that Amanda Bynes show that used to air in the nineties. Would you have wanted to go as a giant lobster, Lindsay?"

"I wouldn't have wanted to go as a giant Lobster, Chris"

"She wouldn't have wanted to go as a giant lobster, Ray"

"You're unbelievable"

"I know. I saved halloween for everyone. You're welcome"

"Plus I think I look cute" Lindsay smiled "I like being the Easter bunny!"

Ray couldn't actually form words for a second "...sweetie...t_he easter bunny_?"

Lindsay nodded, pointing to her ears "Yeah, duh"

"Yeah, duh, Ray" Chris said over her shoulder, giving Ray a very pointed look.

Then Lindsay screamed so loud it made Chris and Ray, and a few people surrounding them, wince.

Lindsay had spotted Beth.

Then Beth screamed as she spotted Lindsay.

The two practically collided into each other in a hug from across the room, other assorted guests having to step out of the way to avoid being toppled over.

"Beth! Oh my gosh, it's been forever!"

"I know! I've missed you Lindsay!"

"You look so good, I love your hair!"

"Thanks,You always look good of course!"

"Awwww, Beth!"

"Awwww, Lindsay!"

Chris raised an eyebrow as he came over to the two girls "Didn't you two go and get lunch together last tuesday?"

The girls pulled apart to stare at him.

"Yeah, so?"

"We also got Mani-Pedi's yesterday. What's your point?"

"I...never mind. I'm going to go get something to drink" Chris said, heading off.

"And I'm going to go help carry his drink. Assistant duty calls" Ray smiled as he hurried after Chris.

Lindsay thought nothing of it as she turned back to Beth "You look _so _good, I love your unicorn costume!"

"Thanks! I've already poked, like, three people by accident with this thing though" Beth said, pulling away and prodding at the plastic horn on her headband.

"Smile for the camera, ladies" A voice called from behind them.

Beth and Lindsay turned around to see a man dressed as The Flash, holding a cam-corder.

Lindsay waved "Oh, hi" she smiled, always eager to see a camera, before quickly leaning over to Beth "Do you know this guy? his voice sound's so familiar"

Before Beth could say anything, Flash pulled back his mask.

"Oh my gosh, Taylor!"

"It's Tyler, Lindsay"

"Oh my gosh, _Tyler!_"

Tyler just shook his head as Lindsay came over to hug him "Don't worry about it Linds, it's good to see you haven't changed" he looked her up and down in her costume "At all" then he turned to Beth "But Beth...wow you look different"

"I know. I usually don't have a horn...or the tail" she laughed, holding the multicoloured strands up from her skirt.

"No, no, I mean...the hair and the glasses" Tyler said, taking in her appearance.

She was still short and by no means thin, but now she dressed for her figure, her dress sinching in her waist to accentuate some of her curves. Her hair was now loose and sat just on her shoulders, slightly curled, and she'd swapped her old fish eye lenses for a sleeker pair of Dolce and Gabbana reading glasses, a birthday present from Lindsay last year.

Beth shrugged, a little embarrassed "Well, not many twenty three year olds can carry off a side ponytail these days anyway"

"I'm sure you could still try" he laughed "But really, you look good though"

"Thanks" Beth smiled, still not used to hearing things like that.

"So what have you been doing?" Lindsay asked.

"Well, I've been busy filming a lot these past few months. Last week was for an episode of CSI Vancouver, and uh, I think I've got something coming up soon for some new pilot they're shooting for the SciFi channel, that actually reminds me to get in touch with my agent about that"

Lindsay and Beth looked impressed...and shocked. More than a little shocked.

"I didn't know you were doing television!" Lindsay said "You should have told me, I would've watched your shows"

Tyler shrugged "Yeah, well, you can't see me anyway. I'm a stuntman. I'm on camera for just a split second where they fling me off a motorcycle or out a window" he laughed.

"Ooooooh" Beth and Lindsay chorused, a lot less shocked.

If anyone could make a career out of slamming into things repeatedly, it was Tyler.

"I've seen you on TV though, Lindsay. The guys I work with wouldn't believe I used to date you if I didn't have proof, I think you're the only reason they watch it. It's good to see you get so successful, you know? Even if you have to work with Chris" he laughed.

Lindsay's smile tightened as she laughed along with him "Yeah, I know right..." she trailed off, "But Beth's successful too. You should see her Etsy store, it makes so much money. Her crochet unicorn pillows sell out like that" Lindsay snapped her fingers.

"And my hand knitted One Direction sweaters" Beth said "They're my new top sellers. I have a waiting list for those. I'm thinking of making Taylor Swift mittens next "

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"You just couldn't help yourself could you"

Chris almost spilled his drink as he was pulled back around from the bar by an unimpressed looking Ray.

"Hey, it's free, why _not_ get the expensive stuff" Chris said as he sipped.

"Not the _drink, _you hack, Lindsay's costume! It 'mysteriously' disappears from her dressing room? Please"

Chris smiled, guiltily "Relax, it's hanging safely up in _my_ dressing room_, _I'll give it back tomorrow"

"_And the Easter bunny?"_

He held his hands up in defence "Hey, that wasn't me, she made that assumption on her own and I just didn't correct her"

"Hell. That's where you're going. Straight to hell"

"Yeah, I accepted my fate years ago, time to get on board" he held out a glass from the bar "Cocktail?"

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Heather glanced up at the clock on her living room. Eight forty five. Brandi and Dennis would be here soon. She needed to make some last minute check ups.

"Ezekiel! Hi!" she said loudly, making him spin around in surprise from the buffet table, where he'd been devouring corn chips.

"Um, hi, Heather" he said, wiping salsa from his face "What's up?"

"Oh, not much, just wanted to see how you were, ask if your having a good time or not" Heather smiled, which somehow made him even more nervous to talk to her.

"Yeah, it's a good party, ey" he pointed to the chips "Did you, um, did you make this stuff? It tastes really good"

"No, I just hired caterers"

"Oh, that's cool. Well, I should tell the chef he's doing a good job then"

Heather blinked "...you _do _realise that they're just plain Dorito's from the bag, right?"

"...Oh. So I guess he can't give me the recipe then"

Heather didn't know how much small talk she could handle so she just jumped straight into what needed to be said.

"So what are you actually doing now? Job wise?"

Ezekiel shrugged "Kind of between jobs at the moment. I was doing night fill for a super market but I got fired for taking home some expired ramen noodle packets. I thought they were just gonna' be thrown out anyway, you know? I wouldn't have called it stealing like they did-"

"Ok, great. That's great" Heather cut him off quickly "But...well, what are you doing next? What job are you looking for? What could you say to someone if they asked where your career was going?"

Ezekiel looked confused "I...uh...I dunno. I have an appointment with the unemployment office next week, if that's what you-"

"No, don't say that. Don't say that at all" Heather rubbed her hands over her temples as she thought "Ok, how about this...why don't you tell people that you...you are currently looking into going over seas too ...Guatemala, perhaps...to teach young school children about...things?"

Ezekiel look even more confused.

"But...I'm not planning on doing that at all"

"Yeah, but it sounds like such a good thing, doesn't it? People would really respond to that"

"Um, Maybe, I don't-"

"And you know what? It's believable. You're a caring guy, you were home schooled yourself, you want to travel. I think people could totally see you going overseas to teach the under privileged in life. I can totally see it myself" Heather put a hand on his shoulder and Ezekiel found himself standing up a little taller.

"I...Really? You could see me doing that?"

"Oh, yeah!" Heather gushed "I can't believe you've never thought of it yourself! Can't you picture it? The hot climate, the sandy beaches or...the sandy desert, I don't actually have a clue where Guatemala is or what's in it, but man! I can see you there. Teaching those orphans, being on the world vision adds, adopting a few local children ala Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt"

Ezekiel stared at her, his confusion being slowly replaced with a look of awakening "Wow...you know what, that does sound...I can see it too" he nodded, and Heather nodded with him.

"You could make a difference. Do you want to be a guy who makes a difference?"

Ezekiel puffed out his chest and a smile began to spread across his face "Yeah...yeah, I do! Thank you, Heather. You know I've really been feeling kind of down lately and really lost about what I should do with my life, and where I fit with the world, but now it's like you just-"

"Ok, yeah, whatever. Just no mentioning night fill and Ramen. You're all about your world peace education goals now, ok? Ok" she clapped him roughly on the shoulder as she went to stalk back through the crowds, but quickly turned back around "Oh, wait, one more thing. What are you dressed as exactly?"

Ezekiel smiled "I'm the vampire guy from Twilight. I know chicks really dig that"

Heather forced a smiled "Oh. Cute"

There were some things she could save, and some things she could not.

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Gwen stared as Heather walked away from Ezekiel, her eyes narrowed.

She'd been standing some way down the snack table down near the guacamole, close enough to overhear them, but far enough away to be hidden by a guy dressed as a quarterback. and what the hell had all that been about?

"Hey, here's your drink. I don't know what's in it, but it's sugary and alcoholic. I hope you don't mind that it's pink" Le'Shawna bustled over with a couple glasses in her hand "What's up, who're you looking at?"

Gwen took the glass as Le'Shawna tried to follow her friends line of sight.

"Oh, please don't tell me you were checking out Ezekiel?"

"Ew, no" Gwen frowned "But I think I just witnessed him receive some sort of divine intervention from Heather though"

Le'Shawna had to actually stop sipping her drink "...You what?"

"I know. It was weird"

"You know, I just heard her mention she didn't even want him coming earlier"

"Really? Because she just gave him life advice to go teach children in third world countries. I think he took it too, right now he looks about ready to drive to the airport after the party"

"Why would Heather give someone life advice? If anything I would expect Heather to want to destroy someones life, not help it" Le'Shawna frowned.

"Yeah, but you know what was really weird about it? She kept saying stuff like 'oh, that's what you need to say if anyone asks you what you do' and 'don't mention your old, shitty job'. It was like she was embarrassed of him, like she didn't want any of her 'cool' guests to now she was associating with Ramen stealers"

"Ramen stealers?"

"I- never mind, it was relevant" Gwen sighed as she looked around the room "It's like I overheard people talking earlier and I get the impression Heather throws a lot of parties, you know? I just don't get why _all of us_ are suddenly invited to this one"

"Yeah, I know what you mean, I told you something weren't right with this party from the beginning. If you ask me she's up to something"

"Listen to us, we sound like we should be on an episode of Scooby Doo"

"And I would've been partying with Usher, if it weren't for that meddling Heather and her dumb dog Alejandro" Le'Shawna shook her fist and Gwen lost it laughing.

"Oh my god, I'm actually so glad that Usher thing wasn't real. Seeing you in person again is amazing"

"I know, facebook and phone calls just don't cut it sometimes" Le'Shawna smiled as the girls clinked their glasses together.

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"Urgh, I really shouldn't be eating these" Bridgette muttered ,filling a plate with slices of garlic bread "I've had this thing with gluten recently, I can't eat it without bloating like crazy"

"Then why don't you just...not eat it?" Courtney suggested.

Bridgette stared at her "...but it's garlic bread?"

She grabbed one more slice for good measure.

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With the party now in full swing, a lone car sat parked across the street. Brandi and Dennis watched the house from the front seats, with Brandi checking her lip stick in the rear view mirror, and Dennis keeping an eye on the car dashboard.

"Aaaaand, thats one minute past nine. There, we're officially fashionably late enough"

Brandi dropped her lipstick back into her purse and snapped it shut, giving one last smack of her lips.

"Perfect. How's my costume?"

"Amaze. You make the cutest slutty Geisha ever. How's mine?"

"Also Amaze, you make the cutesy slutty gay pirate ever"

"Do you think people will get the Johnny Depp vibe I was going for? Except, like, not old?"

"Oh, yeah, totally. You're eyeliner looks almost as good as mine" Brandi said as they both got out of the car.

Dennis smirked as they linked arms, making their way towards the house "So, do you think Heather _actually _managed to get any celebrities to this party?"

"Oh, please. Like she actually thought we believed her whole 'I'm invited to Kimye's wedding thing'. How dumb does she think we are?" Brandi scoffed "I just want to go in there and see her face when she tries to make up some excuses as to why there aren't any famous faces around. It'll be so tragic and I'll love every minute of it"

"What if she got any old Total Drama people to come?"

"Oh, she did" Brandi nodded "I snooped through her emails. They're all coming"

Dennis suddenly looked excited "Wow, so she wasn't bullshitting about everything then, she does know at least a few celebrities"

Brandi just laughed "Oh my god, like they're _actual_ celebrities? The most successful ones out of any of them are the black girl on that music countdown show, the idiot on MTV , and the old host and the bimbo on that gameshow. In the world of celebrity I can barely even remember their names"

"What about Alejandro though?" Dennis said with a raise of his eyebrows and Brandi put a hand over her heart.

"Oh, how could I forget. My trashy TV husband, forgive me" she giggled "He is the _one_ person who will be there who's worthy of my time"

"Do you think it would be sad if I asked for an autograph? I hate being addicted to his show, _but I am literally addicted to his show_"

"Dennis, no! We must conduct ourselves with self control...especially if I want to potentially go home with him tonight. I can't look too desperate" she smiled deviously.

"Don't you think it would be weird though? Because he's still Heather's Ex..."

Brandi frowned "So? We don't even like Heather, and I know that Bitch doesn't like us"

"True"

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"Heather!"

"Brandi!"

The two girls squealed with delight as they hugged at the door.

"Sorry we're late! Got held up in traffic"

"That's ok, as long as you're here, that's all that matters!"

"We wouldn't have missed it for the world!"

This entire conversation was as fake as their acrylic nails.

Heather stepped back and...uh..._admired_ Brandi's costume.

"You like?" Brandi did a little twirl "I'm a sexy Geisha"

Heather stared at the tight silk dress, gaudy red lipstick and cheap fan she posed with.

"Yeah...you look nice" she smiled tightly "But you do realise that's a traditional chinese dress, don't you?"

"Hm?"

"A Cheongsam"

"Bless you"

"No I mean you're wearing a chinese dress. Geisha's are Japanese" Heather glanced her up and down.

Brandi stopped "Oh..well, they're basically the same anyway, right? Tom-a-to, Tom-ah-to"

Heather's eyebrow raised and Dennis nudged Brandi a little.

"Oh, I'm sorry, I'm such an idiot. You know, I practically forget your asian because you don't talk like one of them. Was that offensive to, like, your culture, or whatever? Was your Mom a Geisha or something?"

"...I'm half Korean"

"...so is that a no?"

Heather had to resist the urge to shove her fake cigarette holder down an orifice of Brandi's. No particular one. Any will do. Tom-a-to, tom-ah-to.

"So, where's all the celeb's? Did Nicole Richie make it?" Brandi asked.

Heather waved her hand "Oh, no, she had to cancel. You know how people with kids are"

"Hm, what a shame. So who _is_ here, Heather?"

They walked through the halls and Heather gestured vaguely into the crowd "Um, you know. People. TV people. Oh, see that women there in the Sailor Moon outfit? Lady Gaga's dog walker. No lie"

Brandi and Dennis exchanged looks.

"And, uh,..that guy over there works in a recording studio with _all_ the latest stars. Mariah Carey and Rihanna and everything"

He was only a janitor, but whatever. Technically she was telling the truth.

"Ha, as if Mariah Carey is one of the _latest_ stars" Dennis muttered as he surveyed the rest of the crowd, his eyes falling on the snack table "Ohmygod, is that Courtney?"

Courtney whipped around with a smear of pasta salad on her face.

"Hmm?"

"Oh my goooood, you were one of my faves on the show!" Dennis cried as he strode over to her, Heather and Brandi following "You were _such_ a bitch!"

Courtney glanced over at Bridgette like she could offer help, but Bridgette avoided her gaze and took another bite of garlic bread.

"Um...thanks. I guess"

"Courtney, Bridgette-" Heather butted in for introductions "These are my work friends, Brandi and Dennis"

"Here, take a card" Brandi smiled, all teeth.

Courtney and Bridgette exchanged glances as they took the offered business cards.

'_Brandi Belluci: Scandalous Columnist: A grade gossip on A to Z grade celebrities'_

"Love the new hair by the way ,Bridgette. Very brave. Most girls faces look kind of fatter when they cut it that short...but it looks good on you" Brandi added.

"...thanks"

Heather panicked a little as an uncomfortable silence settled between them all, so when she spotted Alejandro wandering past, she practically snatched him over.

"Hey, Look! It's Alejandro!" She laughed, physically dragging him by his shirt sleeve to join them.

A predatory look erupted in Brandi's eyes.

"Well, hello there" she said, in what was meant to be a seductive purr, sticking out her hand the way a princess may expect it to be taken and kissed.

"Uh...hey" Alejandro settled with awkwardly shaking her hand by the finger tips.

"I'm Brandi. Like the drink, but yummier...and it's also spelt with an 'i'"

She was quickly pushed aside.

"And I'm Dennis...I'm not a drink, but there is also an 'I' in there" he also stuck out his hand, forcing Alejandro to do the same fingertip shake thing with him.

Alejandro slid a look over to Heather. He knew these people were coming but he now he felt like he hadn't exactly been warned properly.

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"-But Lindsay, easter and halloween have nothing to do with each other"

"That's not true. They're both days where I eat a lot of chocolate"

Gwen sighed "But nothings scary about the easter bunny, or easter in general, which is kind of the point of a halloween costume"

"Well, that's your opinion, but to be honest the whole idea of a guy getting nailed to a cross and then coming back from the dead as like, ghost Jesus, three days later seems pretty creepy to me"

Gwen gave Lindsay a long, hard look.

"Lindsay...did you just refer to Christ as 'Ghost Jesus'?"

"Oh! And those white bunnies that have the super red eyes? Kinda' scary too" Lindsay nodded.

Gwen smiled. She needed more alcohol to make it through this night.

Heading to the kitchen she almost tripped over Katie's leopard tail, just managing to catch herself before she stacked it to the marble floor.

"Oh my gosh, sorry Gwen!" Katie called over her shoulder.

"S'alright!" she called back, not slowing her pace to the free drinks.

If there was ever a god of cruel karma, the two giraffe girls from earlier had witnessed her stumble and were laughing obnoxiously from across the room.

She imagined them being poached in the wild, their heads mounted on a trophy wall.

Hey, it was halloween, she was allowed to be macabre.

"-and heres the downstairs bathroom. The toilets are like those super modern ones, from Tokyo. The seats are heated"

Talking of people Gwen wouldn't mind seeing mounted on a wall, there was Heather, showing off her bathroom to a couple of party-goers, with Alejandro tagging along.

"Oh, and the Jacuzzi bath upstairs in the en-suite? Five jets with four different settings"

Brandi and Dennis let out impressed 'oooh's.

Brandi gave Alejandro a little nudge "Mmm, I love a bath with a good jet"

Alejandro laughed. Forcedly.

"Well, as nice as your bathroom is, I really just needed to _use_ the bathroom, not hear about it. Honestly. Bladder the size of a walnut" she laughed, handing Alejandro her empty glass "You can get me a top me up"

"Ooh, could you get me one too? White wine. If you have it. Nothing too dry though" Said Dennis, passing his glass along to Alejandro too.

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Gwen was still laughing to herself as she poured herself her own cocktail.

_I love a bath with a good jet?_ Was that meant to be a come on? Alejandro could really pull the cougars. At least the women looked like a cougar. Truthfully she couldn't tell. Women with that much work done could either be twenty five or forty. Either way, it was amazing to see the way Heather's face twitched as she watched the cougar rub a slow hand over Alejandro's arm.

"Ah, miss? Are you _sure_ you don't want me to make that for-"

"No, I'm good"

"But the recipe book says not to add that much vodka-"

"I said I'm good"

As the bar man slinked away, and gwen eventually put the bottle of Grey Goose down, she could hear a pair of voices approaching. Arguing voices.

"She winked at me, Heather. She _winked!_"

"Oh, suck it up, _Al_, it's not like she groped you in front of the canapés"

"It looked like she was thinking about it! And don't call me Al, you know I hate it"

"Well, you know what I hate? When my friends want to sabotage my attempts at throwing a celebrity party"

"Who's sabotaging? I just don't want to be pimped out to these people you don't even like"

Now Gwen didn't _want_ to make a habit of eavesdropping on Heather and her private conversations...

...And actually, she didn't know where she was going with that sentence. She totally didn't care if she made a habit of listening in on Heathers private conversations. She slunk back behind another couple of party goers and drank in every word.

"It doesn't matter if I like them or not, but it matters if they like me...or at least think that I'm better than them"

"And have famous friends, and a huge house, and imported japanese toilets?"

Heather rolled her eyes "_Exactly, _I thought you had already grasped this concept when I called you"

"I had, but you didn't tell me one of them was a succubus with a bad tan!"

"You're a soap star, aren't you used to those by now?!"

"Ahem"

Both Heather and Alejandro stopped glaring at each other for a second to turn and face Gwen, who stood there with a hand on her hip, and an unimpressed look on her face.

"...Can we help you?" Heather asked.

"So that's what that thing with Ezekiel was all about earlier?" Gwen tutted.

"What? What thing, what are you talking about?"

"Making up some crap about Guatemala he can tell people to make him sound better"

"Oh, that...wait, how do you even-"

"You just dragged us all here to 'impress' your friends, didn't you? I see what this is about, you don't want to have a re-union, you're just using us!" Gwen said, disgusted.

Heather scoffed "Oh, don't look so shocked. Aren't you used to me by now?"

"Heather, this is just...it's so shallow I almost can't even comprehend it!"

"Hey, if you ignore my intentions, really I just invited everyone to a nice party with free alcohol. I've heard that's what _nice_ people do"

Gwen turned to Alejandro in disbelief "And you're going along with this?"

Heather didn't even give him time to think about answering that before she snapped back at Gwen.

"What do you care if Im trying to impress people? You don't have to have any part of it. You weren't one of the people I was going to 'use' to impress anyone anyway!"

Gwen's eyes narrowed "Then why would you even invite me?"

"I invited _everyone_ and you weren't exactly top of the list either!"

"What is _that_ supposed to mean!?"

"Oh, right, like Miss living in her crappy rent controlled apartment, hot glueing trash from last nights take-out to a piece of construction paper, counts as a 'success story'. I wouldn't brag about your life to the homeless guy who washes car windows at the lights"

Alejandro's eye's widened at that and Gwen gaped.

"Seriously, Heather, you are such a bitch"

"Ok, again, it's like have you not met me? Come on"

"You know what? Just because I haven't bought into this whole life of reality TV fame, if that's what you want to call it, doesn't mean I'm not successful! Hey, it's a success in itself that I've actually managed to reject this whole pseudo 'glamorous' world of attention whoring and instagram followers! I dared to step away from that because I don't need it!

"And that's all very 'Daria' of you, but I don't care, ok? If you don't want to be here, you can go 'stick it to the man' somewhere else" Heather said scathingly.

Gwen downed the last of her drink and slammed it on the table "Fine. Like I want to be here one more second anyway"

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"Aw man, did you see that?!"

Noah looked up "What, Ezekiel? What about him?"

Cody threw a hand up in the air "He's wearing a Twilight costume as well!"

"...how can you tell? He looks just as homeless as he used too"

"But look, he's got the grey jacket and the gelled hair and everything"

"Does he sparkle like a pole dancer that works somewhere that also sells hot wings?"

"Come on, can you just let the stripper jokes die?"

"Never. I'm engraving it on your tombstone. Your coffin will be covered in glitter"

Just then, Owen ambled over to them through the crowd, his arms laden with candy and crab cakes, Izzy following with an entire skull shaped bowl of Skittles.

"Hey, Cody. We spotted Gwen head past us when we were at the snack table" he said, a Reeses pieces cup into his mouth as he talked "You gonna go and talk to her yet?"

"Gotta' go in for the kill" Izzy said, shoving a fistful of Skittles in her mouth.

Cody craned his neck over the crowd, just in time to see Gwen move into the next room. An advantage of having a growth spurt in the last few years.

"I dunno. I wan't to but... I'm kind of starting to doubt this outfit choice"

"_Starting_?" Noah scoffed, going to reach for some Skittles but having his hand slapped away by Izzy.

"I mean, look at her. She look's so cute" Cody sighed.

"She's covered in fake blood"

"I know, she pulls off everything. I can't walk up to her all...sparkling. God, this was a stupid idea, I regret all of my choices"

Noah was once again slapped away from the Skittles, and giving up, he stuck his hand into his jeans pocket, pulling out his car keys.

"Here, I've got a jacket in the back of my car you can wear, and whatever that doesn't cover up, there are wet wipes in the glove compartment"

Cody took the keys with a smile "Sweet, thanks...but why do you have wet wipes in your car?"

Noah just looked at Owen.

Owen looked down at the floor in shame "I get food on a lot of things..."

"It's insane. Like he's Tinkerbell but with Cheeto dust"

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Gwen didn't really think this whole 'storming out' thing through.

I mean, the storm out had been pretty successful. It was dramatic. Strideful. She slammed the door on her way out.

But now came the whole 'being forced to sit in your car for an hour to sober up enough to drive home' thing. Good thing she parked across the road so Heather couldn't spot her through the curtains.

Gwen slammed a hand on the dashboard again out of pure anger. It made the little hula girl who sat on her dashboard wobble her hips violently. Gwen decided to pick her up too and throw her towards the back of the car. There weren't a lot of ways to vent in the front seat of a Ford Fiesta.

Gwen could feel angry tears coming on, so she tilted her head back. Her eye makeup may have been smudged anyway, as part of her look, but that didn't mean she could afford Heather the satisfaction of making her actually cry.

"Screw Heather" Gwen muttered out loud.

"I'm better than her...bet she's not happy anyway. Tryna' kiss ass to those people...probably hate her...it's all so fake. I'm glad I got out of that life. I'm doin' fine...got my art...makes me happy. I don't even care if they don't sell, it's not about the money, Heather's about money, with her dumb tacky, big house and frickin' stripper shoes and ...financial stability and stable career path and...and..."

Gwen lashed out again, this time accidentally hitting the car horn, the loud beep making her flail and hit her hand on the side window.

"Godda_mnit!_"

As she cradled her hand and let out an incoherent stream of swears, and what was most definitely actual growling, gwen eventually just curled up in the seat and went quiet. She sat like that for awhile.

She was a loser. She was living a losers life.

She liked being sixteen, where you had no idea what the hell the rest of your life was going to be like, and you could delude yourself into thinking you could be something great...instead of being a broke twenty three year old, who was probably going to have to work at a supermarket forever, or get an office job, and just in general be another depressed face you see pass you, day in and day out, their bland life laid out ahead of them until retirement, and then their cheap florida condo, and then death.

Gwen blinked, twisting her head to look at the hula girl where she lay on the back seat floor.

"God, I'm depressing"

She wen't to go pick her up, then noticed a box she'd forgotten she'd brought along.

A carton of a dozen eggs.

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**A/N: Whew! Another chapter. Writing these characters is so much fun. I love writing Heathers bitchiness, Courtney's nuerosis and Lindsays dumb cuteness the most. Oh, and Chri's asshole-ish-ness...and Noah's asshole-ish-ness. I just really like asshole. Don't take that sentence out of context.**


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